Expert: Thurman C. Petty, Jr. - 2/6/2009

Question
I'm a Christian as well as my husband. Our nephew (who is also a Christian) recently fell on financial bad times so we allowed him to move in with us. He's been in communication with a girl from across the states via the Internet. She says she's a Christian as well, and would like to come visit my nephew on an innocent and spiritual bases. Since he lives with us he asked if she could stay in our home in his room. He said he would sleep on the floor and she can sleep in his bed. My first problem with this is: he doesn't even know her and he wants to bring her in our home. The real question I have for you is; I know in the Bible it says it's a sin to even give the appearance of sin, but I can't seem to find the scripture. My husband and I have a teenage daughter and I don't want her to think that this is OK. I don't think my nephew is thinking impurely, but again it's the appearance of sin I'm having difficulties with. Can you please point me in the right Biblical direction that I can back my decision.

Answer
Dear Marcia,

Don’t do it! The Bible says: “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” Ex. 20:14. Putting them in the same room together is playing the risk that it would happen. And you would then be involved with it.

My son brought a girl home under the same pretext. She had a separate room, but none-the-less, nature presents a very strong pull, and one thing followed another and soon she was pregnant. I am a pastor, and I should have known better. He was 17, and she was, I think 16, but when he insisted that He wanted to keep his honor as the father of the child, I let him convince me that he should marry the girl and help to raise the child. And I did it!

She led him out of the church and into all kinds of sin, approving—no—encouraging affairs with others—in their home, while she slept in another room. And she had one affair after another—sometimes shacking up with a guy for days. He divorced her in a year. And rebounded into living with one of the women he’d had an affair with earlier . . . Now he’s been married to the second woman for about 12 years, and they have 4 children—her’s, his, and 2 of their’s.

That’s history, but now he’s not a Christian any more and has no desire to be one. I pray that someday He’ll come back.

And this same scenario could happen to your nephew. Who knows? Maybe this girl has just that in mind, or maybe she has other sinister plans in mind. Your guess is as good as mine. But whatever her plans, your cousin has his as well.

You are the owner, etc. of the house: you can say what you will permit. You can say no, and if he insists, you can ask him to find housing somewhere else. It’s your choice, and he, as a guest in your house, must abide by your decision.

The text for which you are looking is 1 Th 5:22  "Abstain from all appearance of evil.". But to understand the text it would be good to read the context of verses 14-23. As you’ll find out, the text means exactly what it says.

Always be ready for Jesus to come.

Thurman C. Petty, Jr.
petty@hyperusa.com
www.PettyPress.com (18 e-books, 40 Bible study guides and that’s only a beginning.)