Expert: Marilyn - 7/14/2009

Question
why is it that every funeral that takes place anyone no matter what live the person lived the person giving the services says the person that died is with God?

Answer
Hello Pete;

1) It may not be truthful to say a person is with God when everybody knows the deceased was a huge sinner. But on the other hand, we humans don't get to judge whether or not a person is with God--God gets to do that. If I were advising a pastor in such a situation, I'd suggest he try to be neutral and not say one way or the other. It might be a good opportunity to preach about how to be saved so that some people at the funeral who find themselves terrified at the prospect of their own deaths without hope might find Jesus. But sometimes even pastors aren't as adept at these social situations or opportunities to reach people as they need to be. Pastors make mistakes too.

2) We just don't know everything about what's been going on. Maybe the pastor was there when the person was dying and the person accepted Jesus as Lord in his last moments.

Evelyn Vaughn was a grouchy Christian writer. Once a lady asked him how he could be such a terrible person and claim he was a Christian. He answered, (my paraphrase), Lady, you think I'm bad now, imagine what I'd be like if I weren't a Christian.

3) Funerals aren't really about the dead person, they're about the people who mourn. It's a time to say "good-bye," to remember what that person was like and what he meant to others.

Pastors may believe that their job is to comfort the families. They may view helping family and friends move on from their loved one's death as the most important task they have. Maybe such pastors believe that a little fib is better than saying, "Well, now that Cousin Sarah is in hell let's move on to lunch..."

4) Other pastors may actually believe that everyone is saved--some denominations and individuals believe that Jesus death paid for everyone's sin, nobody has to do anything to get in on the deal, end of discussion. I don't think that Bible says that, but I know some believe it does.

5) Believe it or not, just because a person is an ordained minister doesn't necessarily mean he knows his Bible or that he's actually a Christian. Some people believe in a kind of new age Christianity gobbledygook that throws in a few Bible verses to make their faith seem authentic when it's really phony. Another possibility is the person conducting the service might know his Bible and not believe it's true.

Thomas Jefferson took a copy of the Bible and cut out of it all the miracles its writers claimed Jesus did because he didn't believe in miracles. Yet, Jefferson did believe in Jesus and what He taught. To my mind, that's kind of messed up, but it doesn't change the fact that Jefferson felt that way.

6) Who is officiating at the service? If it's not actually an ordained minister but a funeral director, then he's just repeating a standard speech, just doing his job, nothing more.

7) Ordained minister or lay person, the officiator might just be saying what the family told him to say.

8) I have no idea. There could be other reasons.

Sincerely,

Marilyn