Expert: Marilyn - 10/17/2010

Question
Is fornication or sexual immorality classified as adultery? That would make it a sin of the commandments. Also, what is the rewards for being a good person. I see so many people who reap the physical pleasures of the world yet they can always be saved by grace. Who makes them so deserving of such beautiful-sexual women.

Answer
Hello Lance;

Fornication is sex between unmarried persons. Adultery is sex involving at least one married person with someone not the spouse. Given the overall attitude of the Bible on the matter, some have equated fornication with adultery defining it as cheating on one's future spouse. Many Scriptures make it very clear that both fornication and adultery are sins, Acts 15:29; I Corinthians 5:1; 6:18; 10:8; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5 I Thessalonians 4:3; Revelation 2:20.

Romans 13:9, "The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet," and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

If a guy is sleeping with a woman not his wife and they never marry, but later she marries someone else, that guy failed to love his fellow man because he slept with that man's future wife. He also failed to live that woman's father who would love to have a shotgun to keep the rats away from his daughter, but can't do a thing about it. He also failed his future wife because he didn't honor her enough to wait for her. And he failed to love himself because he didn't have enough respect for his body to keep it pure.

Jesus upped the ante, Matthew 5:27 & 28, "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

Many Psalms ask why the evil person seems to have such an easy life while the good person struggles. A Christian persecuted in Pakistan or Iraq might ask the same question. Nevertheless, as a believer in Jesus, the rewards for living for Him can be extravagant, Psalm 103; II Corinthians 9:11; James 5:15. Though the Lord promises us many good things in this life, the Bible also makes it very clear that those things (a hot wife, clothing, food, shelter etc.) don't come unless we put the Lord first, Matthew 6:33.

So, while I'm with you on why do the wicked get to have so much fun and we don't seem to, that kind of attitude misses the point. The point is to put Jesus first and not worry about the rest.

Yes, a person can live it up and then accept Jesus later, but he risks dying before he gets the job done, but yeah, he can do that. Some people think they have all the time in the world and put it off to the point where they never get around to it at all.

Most of the time people who sin eventually pay for it big time. Celebrities have all the cash and go out drinking and partying, sleeping around, sounds like fun and they seem to enjoy it for a few years, but then the wife leaves them and their kids end up mental cases; their health deteriorates; they turn into bad jokes everybody snickers about in the grocery store check-out line; they die in car wrecks or of overdose of drugs; go broke; can't get any work... Not such great reward. But regardless of whether or not we get to have a nice time here on planet earth, our real treasures are in Heaven, Matthew 6:21. And our time in Heaven will be a lot longer than any time we might spend here.

Looking at how cushy someone else has got it is called covetousness and that's on the Big Ten list along with adultery. Covetousness makes us overlook the good things we have and causes us to be ungrateful jerks toward God. He certainly won't be giving us more of anything when we're not even glad about what He's already given us!

Sometimes the nice guys wonder why the pretty girls are hanging out with the bad guys. Well, immature girls are doing that because the bad guys seem like more fun. In a few years after their hearts have been broken a few times the pretty girls will either wise up or stay stupid and you don't really want a stupid girl long term do you?

Another possibility is the time's not right yet. Either you're not ready because you're focused on covetousness or whatever or she's not ready for some reason. Jesus said if we put Him first all good things will come our way. You need to be patient. When the time is right, God will give you the woman of your dreams. Have faith. Remember, Abraham waited about ten years to receive the promised son, Isaac.

My oldest son finally met his wife after years of loneliness and searching, but the fact of the matter was, he wasn't really ready for her any sooner, he was too immature, for one thing. But when he finally met her, she was gorgeous and perfect for him.

Be patient. Read Psalm 37:4 out loud to God and to yourself, then do it and believe it.

Sincerely,

Marilyn