Expert: Rev. Frank Ricketts - 7/5/2007

Question
Unsaved-I was married at 18 had two kids by 20, was abused and threatened with death, I stayed in fear and met a youngman who I had an affair with, I left and divorced my husband with a restraining order. However the 2nd man was also abusive, not physically, but was constantly unfaithful, drug dealer and alcoholic. We had a child together, I left him and got saved, backslid and returned to him and married and had another child, couldn't deal with the pain and turned to alcohol and other men to "get even" that killed me inside. Repented, rededicated my life back to Christ and was delivered frm alcohol and adultrey instantly, tried to win him to Christ,prayed, fasted, more women came into our life from his aldultry, I tried to press on and hope for a miracle, but his adultry continue, I now am going to divorce and just continue to pray for his salvation. Was our marriage over to begin with, I know I was forgiven for all my sins when I repented? But was I holding on to something that maybe God didn't expect me to stay in, in the first place?

Answer
Unfortunately we all make decisions that seem to hurt us. In your case, I do not believe that your marriage was over from the start. I do however see that it is possible that God had a plan for you. That plan may not have included your husband coming to God.

I feel that you have never placed yourself completely in God’s hands. If you had placed yourself in God’s hands completely, then you would not have made the decisions that you did.

Let me give an example, since we are the best examples.

I was out of work for two years and I worried about money. This worry was not allowing me to effectively communicate with Jesus. I finally laid my wallet on my dresser one day and told the Lord to worry about my money. I did not ask Him, I told Him to worry about it.

Later (I think it was about 3 weeks later), I was sitting in another Pastor’s church and the Lord said –“You gave me your money, now give me them – meaning my congregation. I quit worrying about whether they would hear, I concentrated on what I taught.

Last August, the Lord told me to quit my job. Mind you, I was making $15.00/hr. and full benefits. I then went full time in my church. I only have 12 members.

Why did I tell you all of this?

Have you really completely trusted Jesus? Is there anything you have not given Him?

Examine your relationship with Him. Maybe He wants you to see what you need – not what others need.

I pray that this has helped. We are praying for you.

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