Expert: Libby Bonner - 11/25/2008

Question
My fiance is 41 years old and has had an episode while we were together.He started off by making crazy statements like he worked for the FBI..Then he quit his job he stayed in bed alot if we went into public he would start fights with people..He became paranoid so much that he carried an axe handle with him where ever we went,,He would stay up all night..At 3 in the morning he would go out to the car and blare Johnny Cash so loud it would wake me up inside I would go outside to check on him and its like i wasnt there..He also walked the front of the house with his axe handle at 3-4 am and blurt things out like he was in the military he never has been...He even broke down one day and cried wanting his father which he swears is in saigon..His father lives an hour away from us...not in saigon.. He even raised the axe handle at me one time because I had my cell phone in my hand and he thought I was going to bakeract him.. The dr put him on geodon and he slept about three days off and on the he got worse thinkin there were bombs in cars outside he didnt sleep for 3 days in a row..They switched him to resperdol and he did well he quit taking it about 3 weeks into it went back to work and everything went back to normal for now..The episode lasted about a month and a half it drove me crazy not knowing what is going on..He would repeat himself over and over again..I was wondering is this bipolar disorder or paranoia will it return..Well it probaly will I found out from his ex wife that a couple years ago he was admitted into a health facility for a week due to an episode like this...

Answer
Sound like bipolar to me.  Definitely will recur.  He could become a danger to you or to others, could break the law [ and end up doing time], could spend all your money....it goes on and on. [You don't want to share property or bank accounts or suchlike w/ him.]

Not sure how someone got him to the doc to get started on Geodon.  And then he saw docs at least one more time if his med was changed to Resperdol.    Maybe the same doc who saw him when he was in the hospital???  Patiens, esp when REALLY SICK, aren't inclined to go on there own, because they don't think they are sick.

Start going to NAMI - find a group at nami.org, I hope one that has family support meetings as well as speaker meetings.  You will meet people who are living w/ problems like this, solving problems like this.

BUT you can't make an adult go to a doc, and no one can make him take meds.  Finding the right meds or meds, and the right doses - which is trial and error, unfortunately - and then staying on them is his only way to keep this from happening.  And - even when stable - he will still need meds adjustments from time to time.

His absence from work apparently didn't lose him his job, and he probably hasn't a very accurate memory of his behavior during episodes....probably takes your accounts w/ a grain of salt.

A patient has to 1] have meds that he can tolerate and will stick with and 2] really understand and BELIEVE in the very likely consequences of going w/o meds.

Meanwhile, pls buy this book before he is sick again.  It will get you through it better next time.  Author is Woolis and title is:  When someone you love has a mental illness.  It's about managing to have a life despite illness in the family; how to have the best outcomes you can with the other person even if they are pretty sick; how to feel less helpless.