Expert: Libby Bonner - 1/2/2009

Question
Hello
I have a 31 year old recently diagnosed adult daughter. She has been hospitalized 5 times since September 08,has been in jail a few days at two different times because of her disorder.
I could write a book, my story is so long.
Our current situation is that I have a order of protection in place due to the fact that after been picked up by police a few times in the same day, been transported to the hospital and released, been picked up again and brought to my house by police then within a few minutes of been at my house and having extremely bad behavior, screaming, confusion, hitting me once with her fist, I called police again. They did not know what to do with her since she had no other place to go and her state of mind not been the best at the time but to take her to jail.As a result I was given an order of protection. She is presently in the court system for battery and I am trying to get court ordered evaluation. The evaluation has not been done yet.
Tight now she has been living in a motel and is running out of money. She has no place to go and I have no idea what is going to happen to her. She has 3 children that do not live with her and that I see every week-end.
I live in Illinois and there is no place to turn. She also has no insurance so the state hospital is where she is sent. They have let her out after 3 days in the past, kept her in 3 weeks the last time since the police was involved in the admission. What is a person to do? Our family is been torn apart. My daughter refuses to take meds once she is out in the community. She can not live with me for different reasons, my house is a trigger with her disorder. A lot of grief brought by the passing of her father and 2 other people is in the picture. She has also made bad choices in the past with relationship. Up until this past August she had a full time job and was doing well. Prior to that she went about 1 year doing well after 3 admissions in a short time. 3 days stays in a hospital is not sufficient. She went 10 years prior those episodes. She was diagnosed as bipolar this past November.
Why should the only results be jail or being homeless and families torn apart? I just don't know where to turn anymore.
I hope that you have some ideas for me. Thank you.

Answer
I do have some ideas for you -- but these situations are the hardest in the world.

Nami.org.  At this site, you can find out if there are NAMI affiliates near you.  Someone in a nearby group may be able to answer some of your immediate questions AND I think it would be greatly helpful to you to begin attending any affiliate that has a family support group.  At that site, also, is contact info for the NAMI state office.  They will have the latest on your recently liberalized IL law on involuntary treatment.

To check out more about the change in the law, go to treatmentadvocacycenter.org, and click on In Your State, under Legal Resources....although disregard the end of it; the last bit seems to have been plucked from the Idaho page, and is not relevant to you.  For background, you can also see their tab called, I think, Solutions, one of which is Assisted Outpatient Treatment.

Oh - nami.org or the NAMI state office might be able to provide the name/s of atty conversant w/ mental illness issues, committment, involuntary treatment, etc.  [The treatment site might as well; don't know.]

What she needs, of course, after an adequate hosp stay, is residential treatment for a period of time...but I don't know whether IL uses those or not.   Here is the address for the IL Dept of Human Services, re mental health:  dhs.state.il.us/page.aspx?item=29728.  That's only a start.....and see also next para.

samhsa.gov.  This site will provide you w/ contact info for the two community mental health centers nearest you.

I am assuming that if she will accept outpatient services, they will likely come from a center.  There should be many services there - social workers, classes, etc.  IF she has a private doc, rather than one at the center, s/he can write an order for her to receive one or any/all center services.  While she is in a hospital, as we hope she may be soon, it would be good to get a center social worker involved in her discharge.  The center may know of supervised apts, if there is not residential treatment center for her.

Can you still get her onto COBRA, where she worked, to continue her health insurance?  Though w/ 'privacy,' etc., she and not you would have to initiate it.  I bring this up because her care, her meds, will be expensive......check all this out locally; too long to write.  Briefly, it's possible that she can get Medicaid or some other assistance quickly.  But - failing that, her best chance to get onto the right med/s, right doses - trial and error - are via a private doc, and not a center doc.  I hope you can pass the hat or whatever you need to do to see that she is w/ a private doc until the medication issues get ironed out....though meds will have to be revisited over time. But best to get her off to the right start at least, and not be stuck w/ clinic [center] appts that are not sufficiently frequent to address meds issues, thus helping her stay on meds.

Protection order.  Do you believe she will honor this?  OR - I guess the cops can pick her up again if she is on your property?  What chance you will come home and find her there?  Need to change locks maybe?

OK.  Will this help you get started?  Very sorry it's a weekend, but you might be able to contact a good atty prior to Monday....not sure when she gets out of jail.   ---  What will happen to her when she runs out of money??  Nothing good, unfortunately.  I am hopeful that the new IL law will kick in for you in time to get her into court-ordered treatment.  ---  I don't know the answer to this; an atty will, I hopea;  who the person is who can/will initiate any of this, give that she is not a minor.  Hope it will become apparent.

Do feel free to write again.  These things are absolute living hell for everyone.  One thing that will help you, forever, is to get as many close family and friends as possible on the same page w/ you.  You do not need naysayers talking through their hats, nor those who think it's all someone's fault.  Stick w/ those who understand, or who will quickly buy into the truth and the belief, that she is SICK, very sick, that she needs treatment, and that her behavior is not currently under her voluntary control.

I do have some resources to recommend when things are a little better; be glad to share them.

Of course 3 days won't do it; we simply won't understand and fund mental health care in the US.

Good luck.  Keep me posted if you wish.