Expert: Ivan Goldberg, M.D. - 11/18/2009

Question
I've been able to deal with my boyfriends disorder for 2 and a half years until recently he went to doctor for pain.  he has diabetes and needed something.  doc gave him vicodin.  he is not on meds for the disorder, but now is taking these pills and drinking jim beam on top of that. his moods have been severe and almost threatening. i'm scared and now my kids are involved. is there hope for him? I'VE tried calling and telling doc. but cannot disclose any info because of hippo law. what do i do? i believe he loves me but is starting to show violence.

Answer
Hi Donna . . .

People with bipolar disorder are seldom a risk to their friends or relatives. This changes dramatically when narcotics and/or alcohol enter the picture.

People with bipolar disorder who use or abuse narcotics and/or alcohol are very unpredictable and are capable of aggressive acts that can be VERY dangerous.

While you boyfriend's doctor cannot discuss your boyfriend's treatment with you, he/she should take seriously what you have to say about your boyfriend's behavior. It would probably also be useful to point out to the doctor that you will "hold him/her responsible" for anything your boyfriend does when taking the Vicodin.

It would also be useful for you to explore substance abuse programs from which your boyfriend can get help and it also would be good for you to explore the process of getting an order of protection should that become necessary.

Please do everything necessary to make sure that you and your kids remain safe.