Expert: Joanne Chang - 2/23/2009

Question
Hi I have a 17 year old daughter that constantly yells obscenities,shes always yelling shut up,swears like theres no tomorrow and we'll be driving along and she sticks her middle finger up at passing cars. Shes clever academically, and when I mention to her that she has these outbursts she quite embarassed.I am wondering where to start as the GPs here in Sydney dont feel that she has a problem, and say its just her growing up....but I do not believe this is the case at all.

Answer
G'day Marilyn,

Sorry to hear about your present difficulties but your daughter is truly blessed to have a mum who cares for her well-being so much.
You share in your e-mail that when you mention your daughter's 'outbursts' to her, she feels quite embarrassed.  Is it that she's not aware of her outbursts or doesn't remember them?

Either way, if her current outbursts are interfering with her functioning in / enjoyment of life, the matter warrants further examination.  She could benefit from learning better methods to cope with or express her frustration.

Now, on to the question of where to start.
You could seek the advice and assessment of a psychologist, preferably one with qualifications / experience in child psychology as your daughter is still 17.
If cost is a concern, most universities (e.g. The University of Sydney) have psychology clinics on-campus which charge a nominal sum.
If cost is not a concern, you can try a private psychologist (some private clinics offer Medicare rebates - please check with them directly).  
Unfortunately, I don't know any in Sydney personally, so it would be difficult to recommend.  A Google search will turn up a whole list, but if you know of anyone who has used psychological services in the past (perhaps from school?), it might be better to ask for recommendations.

I hope this helps and do write back if you have further questions.

All the best for you and your daughter!
Joanne