Expert: Joyce A. Anthony - 8/13/2009

Question
Hello,

I have been with my husband for eight years now and married for three. After the first year into the marriage I'm starting to see a side of him that frighten me.  He became angry and irritable all the time.  I assume it was from a hard day work however, it never subsided. He started being really secretative and paranoid about stuff.  Then one evening I threw out some food that's been in the refrigerator for a few days and goes ballistic physically.  My daughter (which is his step-daughter) called the police and they took him to jail for striking me so we then caught a domestic violence case.  For then on out he's been verbally and mentally abusive towards me blaming me for everything that happened and I was the reason to why he hit me.  He then started having affairs with other woman.  My life has been one big living hell. Unfortunately, I'm still with him as I thought things would get better and they did for a while but now it seems like things are back kaotic.  I really thinks he has a bipolar disorder as he have some goods and then there's bad days.  He claims he does not have bipolar and does not need to seek help but how can you go from being happy then outraged in less then five minutes. Then the next day he acts like nothing ever happen and that things are darn good.  Does this sounds like bipolar to you?  Please help.  Thank you!

Answer
Valerie:

First I apologize that computer trouble delayed my answer to you.  Now for your question.  While your husband may be bipolar, the things you stated are not indicative of that.  What it does say is your husband is very abusive and for your own, and your daughter's safety, I would suggest you remove yourself from the situation.  Your husband has a problem, but as long as he won't admit it, there isn't much chance he will be helped.  Please get yourself safely away from this situation.
                 Joyce A, Anthony