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Bipolar Disorder/Marriage, Both Bipolar, Baby on way

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Expert: - 6/21/2010


Question
OK, a lil background if I may, I am Lizz, I am Bipolar for 3 yrs, also have GAD, Borderline Personlaity disorder, hallucinations, and dysthmic disorder. I have been medicated and see a therapist regularly, I have a combination of meds and therapy that work for me, but I am expecting and I have been drastically cut back on meds. I am tweeking more than usual...Hard to handle? Yes, but manageable. My fiance is recently diagnosed bipolar and GAD, he started medication this week with seroquel and klonpin, they seem to be making his issues worse and lately it is all we can do to be in the same room with eachother, we have 2 small children and one on the way and it has started to effect them is ways i can not describe...I have been down this road myself and i know that starting new meds and finding the right combinatio can wreak hayvock on a person and there relationships, but I am trying so hard to be there for him, but with 2 4 yrs olds and one on the way i cant provide my undivided attention to the matter and anything i try to help with turns into me attacking him on one level or another. My quesiton is...Is there anything that can hel pus?? Anything that can being us back together? Could his doctor help with other medications or are we doomed? He seems to have gotten to a point where he does not care about others or his health he does what he does and everyone is expected to go with it or else is this normal? What can I do to help him and help him understand that he may need more help than he thinks?

Answer
I think that the problem your fiance is having is the fact that he's on two medications that are designed primarily to deal with the anxiety and depressive symptoms.  When those are taken out of the equation the only thing that's left would be the more typically manic symptoms  I'd suggest that he go back to his doctor to discuss ways (read: medication) that he can get control over the symptoms that he still has.  It's important that he stay on what he's on now but it sounds like he's going to need something else added to his regimen.

And don't worry, it may seem like a lot to deal with right now, but your relationship doesn't seem doomed to me.  You both need to be operating at your maximum best possible - now and when the baby comes, because that child needs both of its parents. I'm confident that you'll be able to sit down and talk this all out so that he'll get what he needs to do handled in as quick a manner as possible. Let me know if there's anything else I can help you with.  

Bipolar Disorder

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Jennifer

Expertise

I am available to answer questions of a general nature about bipolar disorder, provide online resources that address bipolar disorder in a more in-depth manner and sources to serve as a starting point for those looking for substantial information on the illness from a healthcare professional approach. I am not a doctor or a psychiatrist, my background is based in personal experience and extensive reading in my own process of understanding my diagnosis. I can also take questions that deal with the social issues surrounding bipolar disorder such as relationships; coping for family, friends, and the patient; marriage, choosing to start a family and related. Answers to questions of a legal nature will provide general information but anyone with a serious legal problem should consult an attorney licensed to practice in their jurisdiction.

Experience

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder type II in 2000; as a SSI beneficiary, have experience and knowledge of the limitations and processes involved with the program; I understand the moods, the feelings, the worries, the doubts, and a lot more that there's not enough room to express - from the personal experiences of being bipolar. I have first-hand experience with the challenges of returning to college following hospitalizations and various combinations of medications that were tried before my doctor and I finally arrived at the most effective medication program for my treatment. My family and I have learned so much about each other in the process of dealing with the highs and lows that followed my diagnosis. I've had relationships with someone who also is bipolar and someone that is not - romantic relationships are no easier on either side! I feel that many of the ideas and beliefs that people have regarding bipolar disorder and those who have the condition promote the continuation of social stigmas associated with mental illness in general, and after learning from others with bipolar disorder, hope to guide others who may be trying to navigate the government health care system,& share information on other possible means of obtaining assistance with the cost of medications and/or mental health services and limited financial assistance programs for meeting basic living expenses for qualified individuals, dealing with problems from or with family & loved ones, co-occurring substance abuse problems, medications and side-effects (and when it feels like nothing will work, or why it's not helping the situation to ask whether or not a patient has taken their 'meds' when they seem hostile or moody to those around them).

Education/Credentials
I have a B.A. in Liberal Arts and will earn my J.D. upon completion of the Spring 2011 term after which I will be preparing to take the multi-state bar exam.

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