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Bipolar Disorder/Son's girlfriend bipolar violent lies cheating abusive


My son has become involved with a woman who is bi-polar. She was off her medication in the beginning and was wonderful for about 6 months (at least toward him, was very aloof toward his family and was recorded screaming in a rage to soon to be ex husband). Then she started getting terrible, cheated on him, abusive, controlling, lieing. He left and she finally confessed she was bi-polar and went on medication, klonapin and xanax.  She really never got much better then went way over the top. She was caught telling massive lies over and over to everyone in his family, became very vulgar and violent, threatening to her boss, losing the job and getting a criminal trespass warning issued by the boss. She lost the job of course and blamed him since he was in the hospital having emergency treatment. While he was in the emergency room (she dropped him off bleeding after kidney stone surgery and left) she went to another town and had sex with a guy she met online. Then he was calling her to come to the hospital once they admitted him and she would not until everyone of his family members left because she wasn't coming if those bitches were there (his father, me and his sister). She finally came after 6 hours and climbed in his hospital bed with him, took his phone and his computer and threatened the nurses. She went on a rant, screaming in the hospital room, she was told to leave and he went with her, against doctors orders. Now, she constantly sends his family texts and voice mails threatening to beat us all up (using very vulgar language), went into his father's house to try to steal checks (has already stolen and used father's credit cards), states she is pregnant (has been for months although she sent us a picture of a positive pregnancy test that is the first image on google when you look for positive pregnancy test--she even left the other woman's name on it). My son says she may be pregnant but they have to wait two weeks to find out...she says they have already done the vaginal ultrasound out of town  and he was with her---its a girl (according to her which a vaginal ultrasound doesn't show). He lost his job because of being in the hospital from blood clots (had to go back to hospital after first time) in his kidneys and bladder. He was in the hospital over a week.  He got a new job and the second day he worked, he came home to find her talking to this new guy and found pictures of them together and she confessed, saying it was only one time that she cheated with him (she had cheated with a woman early in their relationship, confessed then "took it back" and said he misunderstood, she was just talking to the woman to try to set up a threesome for them to make their sex life more exciting. He didn't want a threesome. When he found out she cheated, he lost it. I don't know if he hit her or not although I am afraid he did. Shortly after that incident, they went to get gas and a guy threatened him, he went back at the guy, the guy hit him and my son hit the guy back, several times. Now he has a simple battery charge. His girlfriend won't let him talk to any of his family, threatens to kill herself if he does, says he is crazy, she never cheated and never said the things he heard or did the things he saw.  Her ex husband is known to me...he ended up in prison for drugs (she has a drug history of pain killer use and we believe she probably was using most of my son's pain medicine after his surgery--oxycodone. ) The ex has recordings of her rants with him and is working on getting custody of his daughter. She has had 3 children, one that was born at 6 months when she was 18 that did not survive, one born at 20 that is her ex husbands, and a 3rd child that is barely 2 (she is 24) that she claims is her ex husbands but the ex says it isn't his. My son is going back and forth between believing everything she says and saying he is crap, not worth anything and that none of us really love him even if we say we do and talking sense about getting counseling. He said he wanted counseling then said she said he could not go to counseling alone, if he had to go to counseling, it would be with her and they would be in the counselor's office together--he couldn't talk to a counselor without her.
We have gotten to the point where we have to hang up on my son because he calls and cusses us out for not liking her because we won't give her money. Of course, they don't have money now since neither has a job. She won't look for a job again because "it is the man's place to support his family." (Not his family, not his kids and they aren't married). Although she did say they will be married soon and he will be her property and none of his family will ever be able to see him or talk to him again because she will be the only one who can make decisions for him, he will belong to her. He will be her slave.

Hi Beverly,

This goes beyond any possibility of giving advice over the internet, without having any personal contact with the people involved. If the women has bipolar disorder she should be under the supervision of a psychiatrist and on medications to control her illness. There are nutritional ways of reducing the symptom of bipolar, but this is better done in consultation with a nutritional doctor.
As to your son he has to realize that if he gets emotionally involved with a person with a psychological disorder, he can only expect the kind of problem she is facing now.
Perhaps he should look into his own personality, that would allow him to become embroiled in such a situation. This could possibly be due to a low self-esteem that may cause him to choose partners with similar problems. There is nothing wrong with a perosn wanting to help another with problems, but when this involves emotions, it can become a self-fulfilling prophesy.

One way of overcoming a low self-esteem is to treat both the biological and psychological aspects of a low self-image as explained at:

Treatment of a Low Self Esteem

Jurriaan Plesman, Nutritional Psychotherapist.
Hon. Editor of
The Hypoglycemic Health Association of Australia.
Author of "Getting off the Hook"
Freely available at Google Book Search
Skype: jurplesman
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Jurriaan Plesman, Nutritional Psychotherapist


Have worked as a psychotherapist for overv twenty years, dealing with many personality disorders


I have a degree in Psychology from the Sydney University and a Postgraduate Diploma in Clinical Nutrition. I am also the author of “GETTING OFF THE HOOK” which deals with the nutritional and psychological treatment of personality disorders. It is freely available on the internet at Google Book Search. I am interested in the relationship between nutrition and behaviour, and as a Probation ans Parole Officer facilitated groups for offenders, many of whom were alcoholics and drug addicts, sex offenders or compulsive gamblers, as well as the whole gamut of “personality disorders”. I am also the ex-editor of the Hypoglycemic Health Association of Australia Newsletter, a quarterly publication dealing with hypoglycemia and related health problems. Its web site, together with a shortened course of PSYCHOTHERAPY can be visited at:

Editor of the Hypoglycemic Health Association of Australia. Its web site is at:

Author of the book "Getting off the Hook", It is freely available on the internet at Google Book Search. My articles can be found at:

BA (Psych) (University of Sydney), Post Gad Dip Clin Nutr (International Academy of Nutrition)

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