Expert: Guy Curious - 9/8/2011

Question
Hi. We are a recently married couple although we lived together for about 2 years prior to getting married. We are both VERY passionte and experimental lovers with each other and have a very open and honest relationship. Before we met, I had many sexual experiences with guys. She has been aware of my bisexuality from the beginning of our relationship. We have and continue to discuss it openly and she has always been very accepting of my past. She has also been very curious. She tells me that she fantasizes about me and another guy together. She likes it when I tell her about my past experiences with other guys often while we are having sex. I must admit, this is a REAL turn on for both of us. Lately the discussion has turned more toward reality. We have been talking about a possible three way with another bisexual guy. She wants to see me and him.. I want to watch him and her. This would be a first for both of us and although I am 99% sure we both would like it, I am not sure how to proceed. Neither of us want to do it with a friend...would seem awkward. Where/How do we even start??

Answer
You, my friend, are a VERY lucky guy !  There are a thousand guys out there who would LOVE to have a wife like yours.  Anyway, onto the question.

It's great the two of you have such open discussions about your desires. So, the next step is to find another decent, bisexual male that is attractive to the both of you.  Sounds easy enough but it may take a while to find him.  There are a LOT of bisexual guys out there who are more than willing to climb into bed with the two of you but the sad truth is a lot of them are married and cheating.  Maybe I've become somewhat jaded over the years but the majority of guys who responded to our ads were married and cheating.  But don't let that discourage you.

First, talk about what each of you find attractive in a guy.  Tall, short, dark hair, big feet, whatever.  Next, place an ad on places such as Craigslist, SLS, Adult Friend Finder, etc. and be prepared to be inundated with emails.  Even though you say you're looking for a tall, dark haired, in shape, single guy between 20 and 30 you will get emails from guys who don't even come close to what you're looking for.  You will spend a lot of time sifting through all of the emails trying to find someone who fits the bill.  

After you find someone who appeals to the both of you, set up a date night so the three of you can meet.  For my wife and I, we typically have two or three dates  before we take it to the next step.  Decide if you want to entertain at your house, his house or a hotel.  Discuss the ground rules and stick to them.  Don't let the heat of the moment take over and make you do something you may regret the next day.  

Play safe, keep the communication open and honest and have fun !  Carpe Diem !