Expert: ***ERICA*** - 1/29/2008

Question
my boyfriend of 1 year and 4 months, today, broke up with me last night over the phone. he said that he has too much on his plate right now and he needs to make his education as his #1 priority. he said that once next quarter starts he won't be able to spend as much time with me because he would be busy with school and work. he said he thinks that breaking up with me is the only thing that he could think of that would not hurt me later on. he said he loves me but he's afraid that his absence would be hard for me. today, i got a message from one of his ex's friend asking me if me and my boyfriend have broken up because there has been rumors that my boyfriend and his ex has been talking about getting back together. (they broke up because she was cheating on him) i was shocked and hurt so i called him and asked him about it. i asked him for the real reason that he is breaking up with me and he said that whatever he said to me the night before  is the reason. so i asked him if it had nothing to do with him getting back with his ex. he did not give me a straight answer so i hang up. we're supposed to see each other on thursday but i dont know if i can face him. what am i supposed to do or say? how do i deal with it?

Answer
Dear Nikki,
If you don't have to see him than don't..... because it is painful enough to go through this breakup and when you add communication to the mix - its even harder.   It doesn't really matter what the real reason is that he broke up with you (even though we think it matters so much because then if we could fix it maybe it would work) no... he has his own agenda, but it doesn't have anything to do with you.  You need to look great, feel great, be around great people.... don't give him the satisfaction of knowing this bothers you - have friends and family that you trust help you through this..... and little by little you will get through it - I promise..... it isn't easy..... But, live your life fabulously and let him just see what he is missing out on !!!Good Luck