Expert: ***ERICA*** - 8/7/2008

Question
QUESTION: I was friends with this person forsince we were about 12 and this year i decided to ask her out, we had so many great times together but it didnt work out so we went back to good friends... i thought she still liked me becuase we were still saying "I love you" to each other but the other day she  said an ex was going to ask her out and she wanted to go out with him, i said i was ok with it (When i clearly wasnt) and i rang her and she got mad at me because she was with her bf and i think he got ideas that she was cheating on him... now she wont talk to me i just want us to go back to being good friends, how?

ANSWER: Hi Jim,
Really there isn't anything you can do except wait for her to initiate contact and resume the friendship.  If the friendship is as important to her as it is to you she will fix it.... that is a definite.... A friendship shouldn't be conditional and only when its convenient for one party or the other.... I would leave the ball in her court..... Warmest Wishes, Erica

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: I've been waiting the suspense is killing me i haven't been able to sleep for a week now... i don't see how she can just forget all the good times we had together :/... is there anyway i can try talk to her without sounding needy and pathetic?

Answer
Dear Jim,
Unfortunately, NO.... You must maintain your self respect and self dignity..... If you try to talk to her this is what you are saying.... you are saying that it is ok that she treats you the way that she is..... you are saying that you don't care that she doesn't want to talk to you, but you would rather make her hear what you have to say even though at this point it will mean nothing to her because she has her own agenda.... I know the suspense is killing you and hurts terribly, but you have to allow her to initiate contact if you are that important to her.... Good Luck and Be Strong.... Warmest Wishes, Erica