Expert: ***ERICA*** - 8/28/2008

Question

Ok here goes. T and I were together for 3 years. I love her very much still. We met in in our home state and were together there fot 2 yrs. We went through a lot of trial and made it through some very hard times but with our love for each other we made it. About a year ago we moved across the country for a change of pace and maybe new oppertunity. I got a good job that required me to work about 2 hours from home she came with me all was ok. Argued a little more but not bad. Six months later I got laid off for eight weeks. We went back to the house, she got a good job to help then, I went back to workfor the next three months we saw each other on weekends occasionally missing one due to my work. About a month ago she said she was homesick and that she wanted to go home. I said ok, thought I was handleing it ok. I drove her back home 3 weeks later. As the three weeks went on I realized this wasn't ok. I love her so much she is very much my other half. Now the problem. I let her know that in time I would like to make it work be together. At this point she is interested in someone else and I respect that. A few days ago I told her that right now it hurts too bad to talk to her. (I get a lot of short and one word answers) I know we drifted apart and that she needed more than I was giving but hind sight is 20/20. I will get over her but at the same time I want to make it work. I know I need time and so does she but I don't know where to take any of this once I feel like I can talk to her again. I'm so lost. Please help me.

Answer
I know that you are going through a very difficult time.  Give her the space that she needsL but it appears that she isn't emotionally invested in the relationship anymore.  I wouldn't take on all the blame because you were doing the best you could given the circumstances.  I think that the best thing for you right now is to start accepting that the relationship is over and then allow both of you the distance that is necessary to hopefully at some point be friends.  Good Luck and Warmest Wishes...Erica