Expert: ***ERICA*** - 8/5/2008

Question
hi,I'm 29years old woman.I had a long term(9years)relationship with my ex.But now he ended our relationship with the reason he don't want any commitment yet.It does break my heart deeply.There's no sign that we will have this type of problem.We used to be very very happy couple,he's very caring,sweet,and treat me like his princess
but now..it's gone.very sudden and makes me feels like i had lost everything.please help me how i should face with this kind of feeling..cause i love him too much  

Answer
Hi Sarmiza,
The only thing that will make the icky feelings go away is time.... That is about it.... But, you must take care of yourself... Surround yourself with great family and friends, find things that you like to do or never tried before and do them, take a vacation, rediscover and reinvent yourself... Now is the perfect time to meet and reconnect with you.... Breakups are so incredibly difficult and I know that the pain goes right to the core of your being.  Time heals all wounds and know that if he really wants to be with you he will do everything he can to have you in his life.  If that should never happen then you are better off knowing so that you can find that person that thinks you are absolutely fabulous and wants to be with you completely.  I know that there are so many unanswered questions, shock, and despair that accompany the breakup, but rarely do we get the answers and when we do they usually aren't to our satisfaction anyway.  Try to not become "that girl" by calling him and texting him.  Maintain your self dignity and self respect by letting him know that you can live without him.  This was his choice to let you go.. not yours.... Warmest Wishes, Erica