Expert: ***ERICA*** - 9/24/2008

Question
I had been with my girlfriend for 4 years, we have split for a duration of 3 months during this period, i am 26 and she is 25. We both love each other but seem to row about things, she is really moody and digs at me quite a lot, lately i have been really unhappy being with her and constantly think about splitting up.

Recently she said she thought we were going nowhere and said unless i move away from my family with her and ask her to marry me its over which i thought was unacceptable so she said it was over. After this i was a bit down and hurt but was looking to move on. I didn't hear from her for a couple of weeks until she phoned me and said she made a mistake and was sorry and wanted me back! Her plan had backfired!! During this time i thought a lot and now i want a bit of time and space to think about things but I'm so confused and she keeps calling me!! I really don't know what to do!! Its so easy just to pick up the phone and get back with her but it wont be for the right reasons!! She hasn't rang in a few days which as confused me even more, am i doing the right thing! What do you think i should do?

Answer
Hi Steve,
It is normal to miss someone after a breakup, but that isn't a good enough reason to get back together.  Give yourself this time to see if she is the person that you want to really be with. You stated that you have been really unhappy for a while.  Maybe the 2 of you just needed this break or maybe its time that both of you moved on.  Either way - I think you have some thinking to do that way you don't get back together for the wrong reasons.  Good Luck and Warmest Wishes, Erica