Expert: ***ERICA*** - 9/1/2008

Question
Hi, Erica
Ok here's my story,about a month ago my girlfriend of 10yrs broke up  after she caught me lying about some money issues.Nothing big but still I lied.
I tried to work it out because we have good relationship on the whole.
She said that without trust there is not relationship,we have had lying issues it the past (not cheating)  before this and have alway worked them out.
She told me that she loved me very much,but did not what to invest any more time in the relationship.
About two months prior to this fight she had meet a friend that was going thru a divorce and she had befriended him.
I told her that I did not like the sitution because he was so emotionally unstable and could mistake her symphony for something else.
She said that she would not get so personal with him.
Know she is going out all the time and he is there with other friends.
She says that she is just having fun that nothing is going on.
My problem is that we live together and can't financially spit at this time.
I fell so confused and asked here to sleep in the extra bedroom.I plan on moving out in four months to support her till I move back home with my family.
I find myself checking her phone and focusing on what she is doing.
How do I separate for her while living in the same house.

Answer
Dear James,
It's not possible to seperate the 2... Realistically, it is going to cause you tremendous pain and torment as you go through this.  She has made a decision to move on with her life and unfortunately you have to respect it.  In order to seperate yourself from this situation you have to be away from it.  I know that you would like to believe that you can get through this, but if you do you will come out of it as though you battled a tragic war.  Please do yourself a favor - accept that the relationship is over and relocate yourself as quickly as possible.  We all make mistakes throughout the course of a relationship and as long as its not a deal breaker if 2 people want to make it work they can but they have to be willing to throw themselves into it completely.  Good Luck and Warmest Wishes, Erica