Expert: ***ERICA*** - 9/13/2008

Question
I recently broke up with my boyfriend a week ago because of many good reasons. I realized in the end that he just wasn't the right guy. We spent more than 3 and a half years together and been through so much. As much as I want to get back together sometimes, I know I will be happier without him in the long run. We no longer keep in contact because I thought it would be a lot harder to get over each other if we remained friends.

The problem is, we have so many things like photo albums, things we used on our anniversaries like candles, decoration, MANY MANY MANY stuffed animals (maybe over $200 worth) that he's given me over the years for anniversaries, birthdays, and just because.

I don't plan on getting back together with him at the moment (maybe 3 years later if we're both still single but highly unlikely).

So what should I do with all that stuff? Should I just keep it because they are all very nice looking and complete my bedroom or should I throw/sell/give it away in order to move on? I can't give them back to him because I know he won't accept them either.

Especially since it will be so hard because I have emotional attachment to all of it... especially the stuffed animals and the good memories in the photo album and picture frames. But I really want to move on. What should i do?

Answer
Dear SM,
If you can keep the stuff to just cherish the memories then by all means do so.  But, if the attachments create you to want to go back to him when you know he isn't the right person for you then you may want to put all of the stuff into a box until you are stronger.  Sometimes when we get lonely and we see all of the "stuff" we tend to remember the good times and not the bad which is why it is always highly recommended to get rid of anything that reminds you of the person you are no longer with.  You seem to be at peace with your decision even though you miss him at times which is completely normal - I hope this helps and wish you the best of luck.  Warmest Wishes, Erica