Expert: ***ERICA*** - 9/4/2008

Question
QUESTION: i am a guy met this girl one year ago, at the very beginning, we were just friends and she told me that she is interesting in this guy she met online 2 years ago, i was fine at the first. but later i fall in love with her and she is kind of like me too and we kissed. But whenever i asked her if she loves me or the guy she met online, she always says she wants both. I tried to broke up with her once but she cried and we got back together. Then she went to school which is in a different state. we still talk to each other every day, i asked her last night again if she likes me more or the guy she met on internet, she did not say anything, i told her that i am going to move on and forgetting her cause i am in pain to knowing that i love her so much and we spend almost everyday together in past one year, but she still loves him. i hurted so so so much and should i move on and how to get over this pain. i miss her so much.

ANSWER: Dear Justin,
You deserve to be with someone who just wants to be with you.  I would take some time away and start moving on with your life.  If things are meant to be they will be and maybe just maybe she will miss you and want to be with you.  But, I wouldn't hold on to false hope... I would really move on with your life and whatever the future holds you are going to be ok.  It's hard to deal with a breakup and rejection, but know that the pain will eventually go away.... If you stay in a situation as the one you are talking about the pain just lingers and lingers with no end in sight.  There is nothing we can do to control someone else's emotions, actions, or decisions.... we can only control ours and everything we chase in life runs away.  Warmest Wishes and Good Luck... Erica

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Dear Erica
i know that i need to move on and deserve someone better, but i feel sad, i can't sleep, i don't have appetite, i can't concentrate, i miss her like hell although i know she doesn't care.How am i suppose to do to move on, i depressed all the time....

Answer
Dear Justin,
You are no good to anyone especially yourself if you don't take care of your basic needs such as food, work, exercise, and sleep.  Time is the only thing that helps you move on.   If you are really depressed all of the time you may want to speak to a professional.  It really does help especially during such difficult times.  You DESERVE to be with someone who wants to be with you completely because you are worth it.  Don't settle for maybe's and crumbs that are thrown your way.  Good Luck and Warmest Wishes, Erica.... Sorry it took awhile to respond... the storms had the internet down...