About***ERICA*** Expertise A breakup can be one of the most painful experiences in life. Whether you are the dumper or the dumpee ~ it hurts. It requires a lot of personal reflection and change. It's never easy. I will tell you that I am extremely blunt and honest in my answers. I WILL NOT answer any questions asked by anyone under the age of 18. If you are looking for someone to sugarcoat the truth ~ please ask someone else. Also, I am only giving you my expert advice ~ I am not a fortune teller ~ I cannot predict the future and my main focal point is to help you get through a very difficult time because I have been there. XOXO
Experience BBA
Expert in the How to Attract that Man of Your Dreams
Engaged numerous times ~ grew from a self destructive person to a healthy woman.
Hope to have helped many people go through this extremely difficult time.
Firm believer in the book/movie: HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU and SHE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU ~ it is that simple
Question Hi Erica,
I am nearly 19 years old and have been with my boyfriend for a year. During our relationship he has always made comments about other girls and it has upset me more and more. The thing is, I know he would never cheat and he has told me this, but his level of flirting with other girls really hurts me. We have talked about this problem and he always says he will change, but he never does. I am not sure if it is because of this or not, but I have started to feel really low and I feel lost and confused and generally quite bad about myself. However, I cannot deny that I love him completely and when I mention that I'm upset he gets upset and feels sorry himself for hurting me (he has cried in the past). He also tends to tell a story to distract me from what has happened. But I can't understand why it keeps happening. Also, whenever we go out he always seems so bored or distracted and he is starting to make me feel like an idiot for trying so hard in the relationship. Sometimes I think he subtly manipulates me emotionally, but I have no proof of this and I am not sure if it is just me imagining things. The reason I have not left him yet, is because I find him so physically attractive and in times of need, he tries to be there for me. But I don't know if that is enough.
Another issue is that we live practically next door to each other at uni and we are both in our first years. This has been a problem for me with these feelings as I feel so trapped and dependent on him, as I am far from home and miss my family. I am scared that if I break up with him, I won't be able to cope here alone. Please help if you can.
Answer Dear Hannah,
You will definitely be able to cope at your school without him. Yes, this is why you are feeling low, but it isn't his fault it is yours because you are allowing him to treat you this way. You need to start being around new people who make you feel good and finding things to do that make you happy. He may say one thing, but his actions are screaming that he doesn't care enough or respect you enough to understand what is bothering you. You know what is going to make you feel fabulous??? You taking back your power... Break up with him and start getting busy creating the most FABULOUS life possible for yourself.... Do all new things... Meet all new people.... It is going to hurt a lot in the beginning, but don't you hurt everyday already??? Atleast you will give yourself an opportunity to start feeling good about you again.... Good Luck
