Expert: ***ERICA*** - 10/22/2009

Question
IT HAS BEEN 6 MONTHS SINCE MY 2 YR BOYfriend and i have broken up, we spent time away from echother, then he came back and wanted to work things out, slowly!!. then we would fight constantly. and know i find out he's been seeing someone else, he didnt cheat on me this time, b/c we both agreed to take it slow, but he has been cheating on her, n so i stopped calling, textin,answering him, b/c he is showing me he dont wanna work on US. but its like one day im fine, i dont think about him n i'm as happy as ever, but then the next day i'm the most sadiest person,i fear that i have forgave him 2 x for cheating on me, and held on to the love i have for him. that this is gonna just be my lifestyle. i know its not healthy for me to love someone and hold on to that person that disrespects me,and dont feel the same for me. what do i do? how do i make myself  realize, i'm a great,loving caring, sweet person that deserves that back in return

Answer
Dear Sarah,
You tell yourself that you are a great, loving, caring, sweet, and FABULOUS person who deserves to be with someone that wants to be with you and you only.  It takes time to heal these wounds.  Every emotion you are feeling is normal.  I wouldn't accept or send any texts, calls, etc.  If he really wanted to work things out... nothing and I mean nothing would stop him so he was testing the waters to see if you were still there and once he realized that you were ~ he didn't know what he wanted... how convenient.... Breakups are just that because it isn't working....But, they are one of the hardest things to get through because they shake us to the core of our being.  Give yourself some time.... It's all about making a decision to get rid of him and stay rid of him... Once you make that decision to yourself ~ it will be a lot easier ~ I promise, but everything you are feeling is normal... just stay away... Good Luck