Expert: Julie - 2/10/2009

Question
Hi! This is Rebecca and Ive been having this problem with my boyfriend. Im not going 2 say any namezz. But I have been dealing with his anger, and drug addiction. he tells me he loves me and shows it sometimes, he cryzz and tellz me how much he lovez me, and im pregnant with hiz kidd. But than the Next day hez like all Methed out on his dope. Im a young woman and is their any way that you can help us out. Or give me some good answers. Because i really want us 2 work thingzz out. We both love each other, but i think hiz drug addictions is going 2 ruin us.

Answer
Unfortunatly being with someone with a drug addiction the chances are good that this relationship probably won't work out. You are right in the last sentence that the drug addictions are going to ruin you guys. Not too sure what he's addicted to but my ex was addicted to crack, I stuck it out for four years.. and it was horrible. I had to deal with his anger too.. I went thru exactly everything you described...he will tell me he loves me and things will be good, then he'd get paid and he'd be gone on a drug binge. He tried going to AA meetings, he tried seeing a pastor we tried everything together.
We loved each other very much as well but unfortunatly, it was too much and I had to break up with him. Unless he wants to quit doing drugs REALLY bad and commits to doing it, he probably won't quit. Addiction is really hard to beat unless someone commits to it. But as long as you are there supporting him, you are also enabling him to use.
I have a friend who got pregnant with her drug addicted boyfriend and he went to rehab a few times, he tried to quit but it didn't work out and now she's a single mom.
You have to decide whats best for you and your baby..and see if your boyfriend is willing to make the commitment to getting help. If he's not, trust me chances are good he won't just quit on his own..it takes a lot of work and patience.

I wish you luck, this is a very difficult situation as i've been thru it myself and seen others go thru it also...its rarely a happy ending.