Expert: Julie - 5/2/2009

Question
Hi, my name is Gina.

I know this guy for about 4 years. We started dating the year after we meet, I was the one who told him that I like him. But a month later I broke up with him. I did wanted to be with him but one of my friends forced me to break up with him or else he was going to tell him some stuff about me to him.
Three months later we kind of wanted to get back together, and the day that I was going to ask him to be with me again he tells me that he has a girlfriend. They started dating in the month of October, than on May he told me that things weren't right with his girlfriend, and I told him that I was going to be there for him, than he told me that he was going to break up with her the next day. So the next day he kissed me and I thought that he did broke up with her and that he was going to give me a chance. But no, he didn't broke up with her. Does this make him a cheater? I was mad at him so I stopped talking to him.
Than seven months later we tried (well, I think I was the one who was trying) to get back together, and I told that I was going to move to another city to go to college. But a week later, he says that he has a new girlfriend. They have been dating for the last 3 months. Last Friday he was crying because his girlfriend seems to not like him. And again I told him that I want to be with him. So yesterday We were kissing again and he told me that he "broke up" with this other girl, and I checked on his Facebook profile and it keeps on saying that he is in a relationship with the girl. If he didn't broke up with her that means that he is doing the same thing as the did to the other with using me again.

I really need to forget about him because he is using me when he feels alone and the other girls doesn't want him. I don't want this to happen again because it's really killing me on the inside.

I really need help to break away from him. What should I do?


Answer
Yes what he's doing is very wrong, for one, he's using you and for two, he's cheating on these other girls.
The reason he treats you like this is cause you allow it, by telling him you want him still..so he's going to jump at the chance when things aren't going right in his relationship. Dont let him do this to you anymore. Don't tell him how you feel about him, he knows.
Just distance yourself and try to move on otherwise this will only keep hurting you.

I would quit talking to him altogether. If he really wanted you, he'd break up with these other girls and try to get back together with you. But why when he knows your waiting in the wings for him.
Your making it too easy.

So the best thing to do is no more contact, don't talk to him and don't see him. And try not to look at his facebook anymore that is for the best.

Good luck

Julie