Expert: ***ERICA*** - 9/21/2009

Question
Dear Erica,
I'd like to ask you a question.
Well, I'm not sure it's about a break-up since we weren't actually in a relationship.
I met this guy at my new job 5 months ago. I had a crush on him the first time I laid my eyes on him and I believed that the feeling was mutual.

The chemistry and attraction between us grew stronger, and I fell in love with him.

But one day he just suddenly changed. He ignored and avoided me. I felt so devastated.

I read several articles about this and they all said I shouldn't see him for a while. But, it's out of the question. I mean he's my co-worker. I have to see him every day.

Please tell me how to handle this pain. I mean every time I see him, I feel like crying.
I also feel angry to him.

Btw, I'm 36 and he's 4 years younger.

I really appreciate your answer. I'm looking forward to reading it. I really need your help. Thanks.
(Nel)

Answer
Dear Nel,
Well, you really can't be angry unless he led you on to believe that you were in a relationship... Otherwise, you may just be mad at yourself.... It would be a lot easier if you didn't work together, but unless you want to leave your job your going to have to find a way to do this..... Keep your conversations with him to a minimum, be polite but strong, and don't let him know that you are even bothered by him.  I know that rejection hurts a lot.... we have all been through it and the only thing that helps us get over it is time.... Focus in on yourself, your work, and surround yourself with great people and do things you love to do.  We can't make people want to be with us, but the more you meet new people and are open to hanging around with other people ~ someone is going to find you FABULOUS.... It's painful, but by taking the right steps you are going to get over this.... sooner then later... Good Luck