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How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups/sorry this is mispelled im at work and need help thank you :)

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I was going steady with this guy I didn't know to well but we ended  up being in a relationship that he kinda rushed but I had strong feeling too I just didn't know how to express them or know if I was ready to do so or not. I'm 20 he's 25. Yesterday I broke up with him and we are both devastated. I cried more than when I broke up with my fiance of almost 3 years compared to this less than a month relationship because of how I felt. I like him but we were very different. He was very shy and I didn't feel comfortable with some of my qualities and tastes. I'm also about to embark leaving my dead end fast food job to go to school as well as find a better job. I also wanted to get closer to my family and friends. I owe myself time to work on my hobbies and interest and get back in shape. I also wanted time to get closer to my spiritual life. Amongst all these dreams and aspirations I felt like making time for a relationship was hopeless and was scared that as I grew up I might grow out of my original feeling for a guy more suited to my very active and busy lifestyle. However the whole time during the breakup process I had an overwhelming feeling of regret and pain even a  I premeditated this event my heart would cringe and my eyes tear. We were so happy with each other but I wasn't sir  we were going to be right for each other or work out. On top of that we belonged to different denominations and I'm aware that if we had kids problems would arise of which on  they would be brought up in and how our practices may impair each other's own spiritual growth since most people become better at things with support and being involved with their significant other. I miss him dearly and it all feels fake like I just want to be with him but I do notice other guys and had my doubts about us so I'm not sure if this is a sign or what. As you can tell I'm young inexperienced and need help so help me don't put me down.
Thanks

Answer
Lewis,

I am sorry you are in pain.

When someone truly loves another they put that person first, and the other does likewise. Beliefs, faith, and money issues plus goals and future plans should all be in general agreement, but no one agrees totally on anything.

If you wanted time for yourself as the main reason you have stopped having time with this person, you are not ready for a relationship.

But let me just say, you should have talked it out with them, and gone over these issues with an open heart, honestly with them, to know for sure.

True love is RARE, some never experience it. It is a crime to throw it away on assumptions. As you age, the choices get smaller and smaller. Choose wisely.

GO talk it out, the sooner the better.  

How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups

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Sonya Snyder

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All questions related to breaking up with someone in a mature, appropriate manner, based on the individual situation.

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I have become something of a requested expert on the subject of how to break up with someone for the best possible outcome for both parties. I can help all ages with this advice.

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BA Journalism, nearing completion of my MA, Forensic Psychology, continuing on to my Clinical Psychology PhD.

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