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How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups/Revelations about my confusing ex-boyfriend

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Hi Erica,

I've posted a lot of questions before but none of them has been answered yet. I know many people may have the same problem as mine but I'll ask for an advice anyway. I really wish you'd reply.
Me and my boyfriend were together for around 10 months, we are both in our early 20's. We were a great couple when he suddenly changed the way he treated me. He started meeting and talking to me less. He cooled off with me but still kept on talking to me every now and then. We became sweet again so I thought it was a good sign that we can still fix things between us specially when I am there when he encountered problems at that moment. But all of a sudden, he broke up with me in a text saying that he doesn't want me to be involved in his problems and I deserve someone better. We had a personal conversation and I agreed on giving him space. After our break up, he would go sweet to me then casual then vice-versa. I'm so hurt of these swings, I now think I'm the broken one. I talked to him that we should end things and when he's already okay I would still be there for him. We still talk but not too much and I'm trying to be as casual as possible without being sweet or anything since I still want him back.
But last night, I found out that when we were still in our cool-off stage he was already courting another girl and told his friends that we already broke up. We are technically still together back then right? I am very hurting right now, I am angry at him for all the lies he told me, at the same time pitying him for being that way, and at the same time wanting him back or at least talk to me personally to clear things. We only broke up in text messages and I have all of these questions in mind. What should I do? I don't know what to do with myself and with my ex anymore.

Answer
Hi.... I apologize that it took me a while to get back to you... I have been traveling a lot for work.  You continue to settle for any crumbs that he throws your way.  If he gives you a glimmer of hope you accept that... When he's distant you accept that too.  My question is... Don't you want someone better?? Someone who wants to be with you?? Someone who doesn't break up with you and starts courting someone else?? My first suggestion would be to start working on yourself and learn to care more about you.  Once you do that you will realize that you deserve better than a wishy washy relationship.  You will realize that you deserve to be with someone who will be there for you all of the time... They won't throw you crumbs but rather will give you the world... That is who we should all strive to be with.  If you really care about someone don't you do that for them?? He obviously doesn't care about you or your feelings.... Actions speak much louder than words.  I apologize that I probably didn't tell you what you wanted to hear, but I find that being honest and blunt helps people move on rather than give them false hope.  I wish you the best!!  Good Luck and hang in there

How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups

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***ERICA***

Expertise

A breakup can be one of the most painful experiences in life. Whether you are the dumper or the dumpee ~ it hurts. It requires a lot of personal reflection and change. It's never easy. I will tell you that I am extremely blunt and honest in my answers. I WILL NOT answer any questions asked by anyone under the age of 18. If you are looking for someone to sugarcoat the truth ~ please ask someone else. Also, I am only giving you my expert advice ~ I am not a fortune teller ~ I cannot predict the future and my main focal point is to help you get through a very difficult time because I have been there. XOXO

Experience

BBA Expert in the How to Attract that Man of Your Dreams Engaged numerous times ~ grew from a self destructive person to a healthy woman. Hope to have helped many people go through this extremely difficult time. Firm believer in the book/movie: HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU and SHE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU ~ it is that simple

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BBA, 2 MBA's

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