How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups/Moving on after breakup

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Question
Hi,
I am 26.

In 2013 my fiancee was killed. It left me devastated and my life spiraled into a dark void of misery and depression. Earlier this year I attempted to move on. I started seeing "RC" exclusively and I don't know if I really fell in love, or if I was just desperate to escape my misery.

Obviously my emotional state was pretty f'ed up, and in the end, RC and I went our separate ways.

It hit me hard, like being stabbed in the chest. I still have not moved on. It has been almost 7 months since I last spoke to or saw RC. And still I think about him. I have not been with another man since in any way. I just want to hear his voice and touch him. I miss him so much.

I am in a lot of emotional pain. Not only do I still grieve for my late fiancee, now I am grieving for RC.

I don't know what to do but I am very miserable.

Do you have any advice?

Answer
Hi there,

it seems that you should be speaking to someone of more professional regard. While I can help you with some of the emotional pain that you are experiencing, my best advice is seeking a specialist who can deal with your loss and the pain the grief has been causing you. For the most part you are doing great, and there is not much more you can do then just try and move on and do things that feel foreign and uncomfortable. However, do not get yourself involved in relationships just to feel the void. Get better first, seek help and get back in the dating pool at a much better point in your life emotionally and mentally.

Best of luck,

Becky

How to Breakup/Deal With Break Ups

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Becky

Expertise

Any questions pertaining to relationships and break ups and how to deal with the aftermath of a break up. Break ups themselves require intense coping mechanisms to deal with the immense pain, which are ones in which I have dealt with myself personally and have researched extensively to be more well equipped.

Experience

Have been and is currently an Allexperts volunteer who deals with relationships and relationship issues daily. I have also myself gone through a tough break up from a relationship that lasted 5 years.

Organizations
Allexperts Chai Life Line

Education/Credentials
Bachelors of Arts from York University Canadian Certified Teacher from Niagara University

Past/Present Clients
Allexperts

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