Expert: Julie - 7/28/2006

Question
my boyfren and i broke up about one week ago..he sed we shud remain frens..i sed ok..but now he is ignoring my calls n neva calls back..wen he answers my calls he says he is busy. we havnt spoken to each other for 3 days now n i m so tempted to pick the phone n call him..the first 4 days i called n called n called but then i felt like he was ignoring me..i havnt called for like 3 days n he hasnt called bak..i cant take it nymo..wat shud i do?..how do i get over him..i don c him because he lives in leicester n i live in london..wen we wer goin out he either came to london o i wen to leicester..i know his sister n frens..shall i call them n ask them how he is..o shall i jus give up cuz honestly i have tried really hard..please help..shal i call him and ask him y he is ignoring me?  

Answer
There is many reasons why he could be ignoring you but obviously he just wants to move on...and the best way to do that is no contact...I wouldn't call him, if you are constantly calling him then he's going to think you are desperate and you'll push him away further..I wouldn't call his family to ask about him either.

I broke up with my boyfriend recently and believe me I know how hard it is but I also have not talked to him, he calls me and he calls but I don't answer, the reason being is because I need to heal and its better for both of us if we don't talk.
Thats probably why he's been ignoring you.
I understand how tempting it is to call but you have to try to stop yourself when you get tempted.

Believe me if he wants to talk to you, he will call you when he wants to talk to you.
As for how to get over him, it takes time..go out with your friends and stay busy..thats all you can do for now...and then in time you will start to get over him.  I know its no consolation right now...theres no easy solution for getting over someone, but the quickest way, and believe me I know it doesn't seem like it right now, is to not talk to him or try to call him! You're just making yourself more upset when he ignores you or doesn't call you back!!

Take care, Julie