Breastfeeding/Weaning

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Expert: - 4/16/2009


Question
Hello,

I completely stopped breast-feeding my daughter at 1 year and 1 month old.  
It's been about a week since then.  Every since I started weaning she is GLUED
to me (I weaned slowly and I started right at a year old) .  

She won't play or separate from me unless she is in her high chair eating or
in her stroller outside.  She will do a little more without me outside - but
inside she's GLUED.  And she is eating a TON!!

Last week, I went to the grocery store and left her with my 16 year old niece.  
My niece said that she was fine when I left but was a little attached to her!  
When I walked in after the grocery store, she saw me and immediately began
crying for me to pick her up!  

Is all of this normal?  Do you have any suggestions on how to get her to play
and be away from me.

I appreciate any advice you can offer!

Thanks and have a great day!

Regards,
Anna

PS - She began sleeping in her crib also (when I began weaning).  She is doing
well in the crib but it did take a couple days for her to be okay with it.  

Answer
Dear Anna,

First, congratulations for giving your daughter the best start in life by breastfeeding her!

Her reaction now -- wanting to stay close to you -- is quite normal. She has just made two major adjustments in her life, weaning from breastfeeding and sleeping in her crib. That's a lot for a one-year-old, and it takes a little time to process them. One week is a very short time for her to make these adjustments.

I suggest that you pay her a LOT of extra attention over the next few weeks, playing with her, reading to her, sitting with her when she eats, etc. If you do this now, as a preventive measure, she'll adjust much faster than if she has to do it all by herself. For the next couple of weeks if you can possibly avoid leaving her with someone else, do so. Maybe bring a third person, like your niece, into your little group, so your daughter will get used to her. Then, when you do start to leave, do it for only a very short time (10 or 15 minutes) at a time, and then come back. She'll get used to the idea that you will always come back.

There's a wonderful CD and DVD called "Baby Songs" that has a song called "Mommy Always Comes Back" (or something like that). It's a very catchy tune and a very reassuring message -- my granddaughters loved it.

Good luck!

Sally
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Sally Wendkos Olds
Author, THE COMPLETE BOOK OF BREASTFEEDING: Eiger & Olds, 3rd edition 1999, published by Workman Publishing & Bantam Books, and available in most public libraries, bookstores & La Leche League chapters. Now in revision for a fourth edition, with pediatrician Laura M. Marks, M.D.  

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Sally Wendkos Olds

Expertise

What do you want to know about breastfeeding? I can tell you what`s good for the baby, what`s good for the mother -- and the father, how it`s related to a woman`s sexuality, how working moms can nurse, how to overcome obstacles, and lots more. As the author of THE COMPLETE BOOK OF BREASTFEEDING and author or coauthor of 8 other books and more than 200 articles about child and adult development, I can offer sound, sensible advice on breastfeeding, child care and family issues.

Experience

I nursed my 3 daughters and am the grandmother of 5 breastfed children. My book THE COMPLETE BOOK OF BREASTFEEDING (written in consultation with pediatrician Marvin S. Eiger, M.D.) was first published in 1972, and in 1999 came out in an updated 3rd Edition by Workman Publishing & Bantam Books. It is now a classic, with over 2 million copies in print. I am now revising this book for a fourth edition, consulting with pediatrician Laura M. Marks, M.D. This new edition will be published September 2009. I welcome any and all suggestions for the new edition. I coauthored college textbooks A CHILD'S WORLD: INFANCY THROUGH ADOLESCENCE, and HUMAN DEVELOPMENT; both are leading texts in their fields and have been read by 2 million students. I am the coauthor of HELPING YOUR CHILD FIND VALUES TO LIVE BY and RAISING A HYPERACTIVE CHILD, and author of THE WORKING PARENTS' SURVIVAL GUIDE & THE ETERNAL GARDEN: SEASONS OF OUR SEXUALITY. My newest book, A BALCONY IN NEPAL: GLIMPSES OF A HIMALAYAN VILLAGE, published in 2002, tells the story of the way of life in a remote village in Nepal, where all the women breastfeed! My book, SUPER GRANNY: COOL PROJECTS, ACTIVITIES, AND OTHER GREAT STUFF TO DO WITH YOUR GRANDKIDS, will be published March 2009. I speak often to professional, parent and general audiences and make many radio and TV appearances.

Credentials I received my B.A. in English Literature from the University of Pennsylvania, where I minored in Psychology, was elected to Phi Beta Kappa and graduated summa cum laude.

Other points of interest I have received national awards for my writing, and am a former president of the American Society of Journalists & Authors. I am listed in the World Who's Who of Women, International Authors & Writers Who's Who, and Contemporary Authors, and am a member of several professional and civic organizations. I believe: that all parents are working parents; that parents employed outside the home need special support; that mothers' well-being is crucial to their children's welfare; and that the family is the best institution in the world and the one for which we are least prepared. My thrills come when parents or kids tell me they were helped by my writing or speaking or just understanding. To find out more about me, go to

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