Expert: Sally Wendkos Olds - 9/28/2007

Question
I am a mother of 3 beautiful children. I have breast fed all of my children but ended breast feeding when they started to show a lack of breast feeding and in some cases a rejection of the breast.  It seemed to happen all around the same age too.  At around 8 months old, all of my children went on a nursing strike.  For my first 2 children I went with it because I didn't know any better about working through it.  With my last child, I knew that you could work through it but I chose to give in because it was all I knew how to do.  My youngest daughter is now 1 year old and I am still grieving my decision to stop breast feeding.  I recently heard about relactation and I am interested in maybe starting this process.  Do you think my daughter will still want to nurse and is 4 months of bottle feeding too long to go in between?  Also, how can I tell if I still have an adequate milk supply and how would I go about retrieving such a supply of milk.  I have so many questions.  Where Do I begin????????
sincerely,
a hopeful relactating mom

Answer
Dear Erin,

First, congratulations for giving all your children the best start in life by breastfeeding them! Second, don't berate yourself by weaning them at about 8 months when the children themselves seemed to indicate that they were ready to stop nursing. This is a very common age to wean.

If you are interested in starting relactation, you may be able to do it, even after such a long time of not breastfeeding. I am attaching a brief excerpt from my book (see below) about this. I also recommend that you read "Breastfeeding an Adopted Baby and Relactation" by Elizabeth Hormann. You can obtain the book from La Leche League (www.lalecheleague.org). You might also want to look for a lactation consultant who specializes in relactation (International Lactation Consultant Association: www.ilca.org).

If you want to continue breastfeeding mostly for the experience and the closeness, and do not expect that your daughter will be fully nourished from your milk, this may be for you. You have to be very committed to the process -- it can be quite demanding and time-consuming, and with two other children to take care of, you have to ask yourself how important this is to you. I am not trying to discourage you, only trying to present the situation as it is.

Whatever you decide, good luck!

Regards, Sally

Sally Wendkos Olds
Author, THE COMPLETE BOOK OF BREASTFEEDING: Eiger & Olds, 3rd edition 1999, published by Workman Publishing & Bantam Books, and available in most public libraries, bookstores & La Leche League chapters.
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  RELACTATION AND NURSING AN ADOPTED BABY
Sometimes a woman decides, or is advised, not to breastfeed her newborn infant; or she begins to nurse and then stops for one reason or another. Then, as soon as one week or as late as several months later, she wants to nurse -- either because her baby has grown stronger and is now able to nurse, because he has a digestive or allergic problem that makes it difficult for him to take formula, or for some other reason. In such a case, it is often possible to initiate breastfeeding. This process is known as relactation.
  In other cases, women who have adopted babies have been able to lactate, even if they have never been pregnant or have not been pregnant for years. This process is called induced lactation.
  Neither of these endeavors is easy; both call for a great deal of time, effort, and dedication. Both also require very close observation of the baby to be sure he is gaining weight properly. Many women who have made the effort, however, have been happy with their decision, especially if they look at it not for its value as a feeding method, but for how it can enhance the mother-baby relationship. This is the most important aspect of this kind of nursing. If you hold up quantifiable measures like the amount of milk you produce, the ability to provide all of your baby's milk, or the length of time you nurse your baby, you may be disappointed and frustrated. Based on several studies of women who have done this, the guidelines given in Box 16-2 should help you and your baby to achieve a happy nursing relationship.
  
  BOX 16-2 SUCCEEDING AT INDUCED LACTATION OR RELACTATION
  * Ask yourself why you want to do this. If you'll be happy with the experience of nurturing your baby at your breast, and not necessarily nourishing him from your breast, you're likely to have a more positive experience than if you have your heart set on providing a set amount of milk. It's very rare for all of a baby's nutritional needs to be met with induced lactation and may even be difficult with relactation.
  * Be prepared for a stressful first few weeks, during which time your baby may resist suckling at the breast, your milk may be slow in coming in, and you'll be nursing almost constantly around the clock and supplementing your baby's diet with formula.
  * Find a support system, consisting of people who will encourage and help you through the difficult days. These people can include your husband, doctor, lactation consultant, La Leche League leader, and, most important, another woman who has done what you want to do, either relactated or nursed an adopted baby.
  * You'll find it easiest to relactate if your baby is under three months old.
  * Expect initial resistance from your baby, who is used to getting milk some other way. It may take ten days or longer for him to nurse well, but after that he is very likely to become an avid nurser. Don't give up too soon.
  * Nipple stimulation is the most important mechanism for bringing in your milk. The best kind of stimulation is your baby's suckling. Other techniques include breast massage, nipple rolling, and hand expression or breast pumps. (Expressed milk can be fed through a nursing supplementer.)
  * Nurse your baby frequently, whenever she shows any signs of hunger, such as increased alertness or activity, smacking her lips, making sucking motions, or moving her head around in search of the breast. Do not wait until your baby begins to cry, which is a late sign of hunger. In one study, most of the relactating babies nursed eight times a day, at intervals of two to three hours, with two night feedings. (This is an average; some babies need to nurse more often than this at the beginning.) The average duration of each feeding was about 20 to 25 minutes.
  * The most popular form of supplementing the baby's diet is the use of a nursing supplementer (see Chapter 15 and the Resource Appendix). This ensures your baby of adequate nutrition while providing stimulation to your nipples. Many women who considered their experience highly successful continued to use a supplementer throughout the course of breastfeeding.
  * It is extremely important to have your doctor follow your baby carefully for adequate weight gain. The suggestions given in Box 6-4 in Chapter 6 will help you and the doctor assess whether your baby is being well enough nourished for healthy development.

TECHNIQUES THAT ARE HELPFUL INCLUDE:
  * Increasing your fluid intake and the amount of protein in your diet;
  * Resting as much as possible, and lying down to nurse when you can;
  * Asking your doctor to prescribe some other drug, like chlorpromazine or theophylline for the first week or so;
  * Stroking your baby while she's nursing to help you relax and let down your milk.
  * Providing as much skin contact as possible between you and your baby. (See the description of "kangaroo care" earlier in this chapter.)
  * Also see the suggestions given in Chapter 15 for encouraging a baby who's gone "on strike" to nurse.

TECHNIQUES THAT ARE NOT HELPFUL INCLUDE:
  * Keeping the baby hungry to try to encourage him to nurse;
  * Using nipple shields;
  * For adoptive mothers, trying to stimulate the breasts with the nursing infants of friends (the babies usually refuse to suckle at a breast that's not producing milk).

For some of the situations in this chapter -- the ones that require separation from your baby -- you will want to collect your milk to give to her. The next chapter describes the different ways you can do this and offers suggestions for making it easier to give your baby the benefits of breast milk even during those times when she cannot nurse directly.