Expert: Justin Choo - 11/13/2008

Question
The need to end cravings and desire is key, yet how can someone curb desires for love and is that even necessary? How are deaths dealt with in Buddhism? Suffering occurs on some level when a death occurs, how can one avoid this?

Answer
Hi Joey Dolbs,

The Four Noble Truths are ultimate truths.  They go beyond the normal interpretation of life.  

The second Noble Truth states that it is craving or desire that causes us to experience suffering.  What is this "suffering"? It embraces all aspects of unsatisfactoriness, from the very subtle aversion to the extremes of sorrow. Association with what is not loved is "suffering"; separation from what is loved is "suffering"; not getting what is wanted is "suffering'; getting what is not wanted is "suffering". And of course the greatest of all "suffering" is death.  

The only way to end this chain of suffering is to cut off completely, the root cause, and that is "craving".  Ordinary or normal people will have a certain degree of craving or attachment to external objects.  That is why normal or ordinary people like you and me will be subject to exist in this perpetual cycle of birth and death.  

Remember, here we are talking about the cessation of "suffering" forever.  In normal curcumstances, we are just discussing about how to live life.  To live a "normal" life, it would seem ridiculous not to have a certain degree of likes and dislikes. That is why it is certainly impossible for an ordinary person to achieve the Buddhist destination of "Nibbana".  Most of us , if not all, are just going through the journey of existence, and hopefully one fine day we may attain the final liberation.  

"How are deaths dealt with in Buddhism? "
I think in any society, death is treated as a common and inevitable occurence. Perhaps in Buddhism (also in Hinduism) followers are more "ready" to accept the inevitable when the time comes.  In fact there is a common saying that the mission of life is to prepare for death.  

"Suffering occurs on some level when a death occurs, how can one avoid this?"
As I wrote above, "separation from what is loved is suffering".  I don't think there is anyway to avoid this.  The degree of the feeling of sadness can be reduced when the person is wise enough to accept what is inevitable.

Hope this helps.

Justin Choo


[I like to invite you to visit my blog:]
http://lifeislikethat999.blogspot.com/

[And these sites by Rev. Dhammika:]
http://sdhammika.blogspot.com/
http://www.buddhismatoz.com/