Expert: Justin Choo - 11/6/2008

Question
hi,
i have asked these same questions to another Buddhist on here but I will ask this to you also so I might get a quicker responce.

I have been interested in Buddhism for quite a while now, I had recently looked up a few things on the internet about it but there was just so much about all the history, and old rules that I couldn't read the whole thing unfortunatly.

So my first question would be what are the rules to follow to be a buddhist? I found the five rules which were do not kill, do not lie, do not steal, refrain from sexual misconduct, and dont do anything to impaire your mind/judgement. but are there any more?

My second would be would marijuana count as something that impairs your judgement, and what about cigaretts because I've recently started smoking them to deal with school.

Also out of the five rules I pretty much follow most of them except for the case of marijuana, which was in my above question.

Lastly there is my most important question, I am currently living with my mom because I am only 16 and I cant live on my own yet, my mom has been forcing her religon on me since I was born. She is a christian, and I have never wanted to be one but I just have agreed to go to church and all that just so she wont start yelling at me about it, I have found too many faults in the bible for it to convince me that it is all the truth. So the other day I told my mom that I wasn't a Christian and I was thinking of looking into Buddhism, since I pretty much have the same ethics as they do, I'm a vegetarian, I go out of my way to not step on bugs on the sidewalk( my friends laugh at me when I do that. I try as hard as I can to not lie, but my mom then threatened me and said she would kick me out of the house if I wasn't a Christian. I really don't know what to do, should I just lie to her and tell her I'm a Christian, or should I tell her the truth and get kicked out of my house with nowhere to live? My mom is also the reason I took up smoking, just being around her makes me irritated, I really don't like it, whenever I'm around her she just starts yelling, and it really starts stressing me out. when Im not around her I can be almost the most happiest, peaceful person.

Thanks for you input and answers, it is really appreciated also would you be able to send me a responce as soon as you can? thanks again:)

Answer
Hi Melissa,

Thank you for asking me.  I shall try my best to answer your questions.

Now your second question first as it is more urgent.

Changing one's religion is a very serious matter because it may most probably affect people close to oneself. Changing one's religion inadvertently involves some external changes which others will take notice and may feel threatened or offended. You must tread this sensitive path with great caution and sensitivity, especially at your age and the fact that you still depend on your mother. You must be very careful as not to hurt your mom's feelings and sour your relationship with her.

The Buddha taught universal truths which have no boundaries and which transcend space, time, belief, and race. Truth IS truth. We still can practise universal values based on universal truths without outwardly changing our religion. We can practise Buddhism in our heart. It is the practice that is important, not the external physical exhibition.

You can continue to study Buddhism and practise the Buddha's teachings. In this way, you build up your SPIRITUAL awareness and maturity. You can practise Buddhism just like any Buddhist; by keeping the 5 precepts, and paying homage to the Buddha and taking refuge in the Buddha and in his teachings.  

Continue to practise Buddhism SPIRITUALLY and WITHIN YOUR OWN SELF without having to change your present religion. Respect your mom's wishes and do not hurt her feelings. This will be to your advantage in order to live harmoniously with her.

You have plenty of time on your side. Wait till the time is ripe and conditions are favourable; then you can declare to the world that you have changed your religion.

Now your first question about the five precepts.

The precepts are not commandments. The Buddha prescribed these precepts for us to practise to the best of our ability. We are aware that breaking the precepts is unwholesome and in due course unwholesome consequences will appear to haunt us. Apart from that, being intelligent humans we also know that these precepts are beneficial to all and breaking them will inadvertantly hurt others as well. As such it is our social responsibilities to ensure that we live our lives responsibly.

The five precepts are meant to be followed in toto (together). All five should be followed, to the best of our ability. All the precepts should be practised at all times, although we recite them once or twice a day as a reminder of our commitments.

The universal law holds supreme.  An unwholesome act will produce corresponding unwholesome consequence now or in future.  Wholesome lifestyle will generate wholesome consequences.  It is our responsibility to live right and make effort to maintain this wholesome way of life; and hopefully there will be less chance that we have to commit unwholesome acts.  The five precepts are like a protective fence, when effectively guarded, harm will not come our way.  

The Buddha never commanded his followers "to do this, or not to do that".  He merely explained and advised on "what is good and what is bad".  It is up to the person to decide.  

As for us, just use the three common guides and you will find the answer for yourself:  

1. Is the action harmful to you?
2. Is the action harmful to others?
3. Is the action beneficial?

My opinion is that cigarette smoking is harmful to one's health and a waste of money.  So is marijuana.  But as I said, you decide for yourself.

Take care, Melissa.

Please come back if you need further clarification.


Justin Choo


[I like to invite you to visit my blog:]
http://lifeislikethat999.blogspot.com/

[And these sites by Rev. Dhammika:]
http://sdhammika.blogspot.com/
http://www.buddhismatoz.com/