Expert: Joe McSorley - 4/7/2009

Question
Hello, I am a 17 year old High school student, and I would like to learn how to
practice zen.

I don't have much other prospect in my life (I have no academic desires -
don't really want to be a professor or scientist, and I really have no idea if I
really want to even live in society), not to say that I am completely hopeless, I
simply have no real *interest* in doing anything when I finally leave school. I
do not feel like I require any large amounts of money, just enough for food
(so I will likely get some simple job working somewhere for enough pay for a
simple apartment, etc). Basically what I am saying is that reaching
enlightenment may well be my lifelong goal.

I am acquainted with the basics of buddhism, the 8 fold path, the four noble
truths, anatta, anicca, dukkha, etc (I have especially spent much time
pondering anatta and anicca) though I have yet to fully understand re
becoming and karma. I also know somewhat (though not very much) the
basics of Zen, koan, and reaching nirvana by experience instead of theory
(but really nothing more then an overall understanding).

So really my question would be - what do you recommend I do? Can zen
simply be learned from books, on one's own, or must it be learned from a
master, and if it must be learned from a master, do you have any
recommendations? Anything, advice of any sort, really would be of much
help. I simply feel sort of lost on what to do. I cannot clearly see a path before
me.

Thank you,

Howard

Answer
Dear Howard,
   You may well be content living as austere as you say but it is generally a good idea to have a backup plan.  Your goals may change later and you will have little to fall back on.  You can be a Zen master that lives in a shack or one that lives in a nice house and I think most, given the choice, would choose a decent house.  Just give yourself some options.
  There is this thing called Zen, the religion/philosophy, traditions and robes.  You can go to Japan and find a Zen monastery and become an accredited Zen teacher doing this.  A dear friend of mine who has lived in Japan for decades describes this like a trade school for a career in Zen.
Then there is not the need for Zen but the need to overcome a personal existential crisis.  This is the difference between studying medicine because you have a disease you must overcome and studying medicine because it’s a career choice.  I understand both aspects but when you are trying to overcome personal suffering you don’t care if what you do is called Zen or goes by any other name; you just want to overcome it.  Zen is just a tool and there are many different tools to overcome this situation.  Zen in and of itself is just a technique from my view.  You need not study Zen at all to seek nirvana though it might help.  The idea of seeking nirvana itself is very problematic and furthers the problem of the self.
  You can study this school called Zen, through books or otherwise, and learn quite a bit about it but whether or not that drives you to some new and thoroughgoing version of yourself is unknown. There are monasteries here in the US and I have had many discussions with priests and monks from them and have often wondered if we studied the same thing. To quote one master visiting from Japan to one of these monasteries,  “many Zen priests here and no Zen”.
 Why is it you want to study Zen, what do you think Zen is?  Why do you think Zen can do something for you, what is it you want to achieve?  I don’t know if you are intrigued by the school of Zen or if you are driven to Zen by some deeper quest.  Ultimately the ideal of Zen is to face the self, who you are, in the present.  You can do this by really dealing with this question ‘who am I’?  When did I come into being?  Don’t accept some belief or teaching about who you are but really ask in the present who you are.  I don’t know what resonates with you but I think this might be a way for you to approach it.  No matter what you read or study come back to ‘who is this that seeks’, this is ultimately what you are trying to answer.  There is a lot to study in Buddhism but whether or not it can help you is questionable.  It does not matter that you can quote sutras or chant but whether or not you can awaken to your true nature.  Only you can pursue this wholeheartedly.  The texts may give you insight and guidance but it is you that must walk the path.
   Good luck to you.  I know this is a difficult task for you.  Take care,
        Joe