AboutJustin Choo Expertise When in doubt seek it out. All your questions will be answered, and you may not have to agree with the answers. Such is the beauty of Buddhism. You are free to decide. I follow the Theravada tradition, and have been studying Buddhism for more than 40 years. Please view my profile for more details. I have answered more than a thousand questions since joining this category. You are welcome to try me.
Experience I was brought up in the 50's as a Buddhist. For the past 30 years I have read numerous books on Buddhism and listened to numerous talks on Buddhism by well-respected and learned monks and lay teachers. I conduct Buddhist classes for parents of Sunday School children in a Theravada Buddhist Temple.
My teacher was the late Chief Reverend, The Ven. K Sri Dhammananda of The Brickfields Buddhist Mahavihara, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. You can view the relevent website in memory of my revered late teacher @
http://www.ksridhammananda.com
Organizations I am a life member of the Buddhist Missionary Society Malaysia.
Publications YOU ARE INVITED TO VISIT MY BLOG @
http://lifeislikethat999.blogspot.com/
Published a book called "The Rainbow And The Treasure". It is a compilation of extracts from various sources to introduce Buddhism to beginners. (Currently out of print)
Education/Credentials Bachelor of Commerce And Administration, Victoria University Of Wellington, NZ.(1974)
Question I am a struggling gay who is trying to reconcile with this world and my unwillingness to accept myself The wy I am.I still don't see any answer as to why I am a gay and why I m so lifeless and can;t enjoy my life and enjoy what I am why I have to confirm to everyone else and why not the world understand my needs and accept me as is why someone ghas to raise an eyebrow for me
More important to that IO still can't understand why I am like that at the very first place as it is a reason for Dukkha( sorrow) as Buddha said life is full of suffering , this is an additional suffering I have to bear and I am not sure when this will end. what do buddhism say abt this as to get rid of the misery and pain and feeling isolated because of that
I don't want to lie in a fantasy world as promised by islam and christianty ( no offenses) afetr life and I don't care about happiness in next world when I am not even happy in my current life and in this world. please guide how ca I reduce or get rid of dukkha.
Answer Hi Ananth,
Thank you for asking me.
Don't worry too much; for you are not alone. There are millions who are like you. Can we say that these millions are not normal? In the final analysis, one must use one's common sense and human intelligence to think, analyze, and decide for oneself.
Throughout history, societies have always wanted to play "God" and impose "moral" judgement on others who do not "behave" like them; not that their moral codes are necessarily correct. The Buddha did not introduce any "new" or "special" moral standard for his followers, but advised them to think and analyze by using their human intelligence and just plain common sense. We do not have to depend on any "super power" or anyone for that matter to teach us what is generally right or wrong; for example; stealing, killing, and telling lies. Likewise we don't have to succumb to others' opinions about our own private sexual orientation. There are actually only three simple rules which we need to consider for everything:
1. Is the action harmful to oneself?
2. Is the action harmful to others?
3. Is the action beneficial?
The Buddhist perspective of life is that this "being" consists of the physical body and the mind. The existence of this being is the result of the energy of the mind taking existence in this physical body. The nature of life-form that this mind energy affixes to, will depend on the nature of the accumulated "kammic" store-house which the being had generated throughout its numerous life existences. If the kammic storehouse has a greater portion of evil and unwholesome kammic energy, this mental energy will seek a rebirth in the appropriate existence such that the evil and unwholesome energies will actualize in that life, causing agony and suffering for the being. In this sense, you can consider that evil mental energies will seek out conditions that favour such existence (and vise versa). This also applies to one's own sexual orientation. Although genes play a great part in one's character, the mind if properly trained will be able to counter the bad effects of bad genes. As for your case, a properly trained mind with clear understanding will be able to counter the adverse effects of the perceived "differing" sexual orientation.
In my personal layman opinion, your condition is purely sexual and physical. Let not this perceived "differing" condition affect your mind as well. Our mind is very powerful. But just like fire, it works both ways. Practise the pristine teachings of the Buddha. As for those people who want to pass judgement on others; let them be. We all have our prejudices due to our mental "blindness" which we are unable to see the real picture of life and existence.
You need not have to reconcile on the perceived differences. You are what you are; live your private life according to your needs. There is nothing wrong in you.
