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Buddhists/Buddhism and loneliness
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Question
I am fairly new to Buddhism and I have a question about Buddhists and loneliness. My parents are getting older and as I have no other family and I do not make friends easily, I've started to have an overwhelming fear of being alone when they pass away. I believe the Buddhist way is to strive not to want anything from others, including their friendship. On the other hand, I wonder if on some level, humans need to have some social support from family and friends. So I guess I'm confused about how I should deal with this fear in a Buddhist way. Should I practice accepting "being alone" so I am less afraid of it? Should I try to increase my social contacts to avoid "being alone"?
Hi L,
Thank you for communicating.
Friendship is very important. It is always a pleasant feeling to have genuine friends around. Different people have different personality traits. Some are born very friendly and likable, able to make friends easily. Others are more reserved. However we can always make extra effort to be friendly.
"Should I practice accepting "being alone" so I am less afraid of it?"
You can do that but at the same time try to increase your "social contacts".
Take care, and don't worry too much.
Justin Choo
[I like to invite you to visit my blog:]
http://lifeislikethat999.blogspot.com/
[And these sites by Rev. Dhammika:]
http://sdhammika.blogspot.com/
http://www.buddhismatoz.com/
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Answers by Expert:
Justin Choo
Expertise
When in doubt seek it out. All your questions will be answered, and you may not have to agree with the answers. Such is the beauty of Buddhism. You are free to decide. I follow the Theravada tradition, and have been studying Buddhism for more than 40 years. Please view my profile for more details. I have answered more than 1500 questions since joining this category. You may like to give me the honor to answer your question.
Experience
I was brought up in the 50's as a Buddhist. For the past 40 years I have read numerous books on Buddhism and listened to numerous talks on Buddhism by well-respected and learned monks and lay teachers. I conduct Buddhist classes for parents of Sunday School children in a Theravada Buddhist Temple.
My teacher was the late Chief Reverend, The Ven. K Sri Dhammananda of The Brickfields Buddhist Mahavihara, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. You can view the relevent website in memory of my revered late teacher @
http://www.ksridhammananda.com
Organizations
I am a life member of the Buddhist Missionary Society Malaysia.
Publications
YOU ARE INVITED TO VISIT MY BLOG @
http://lifeislikethat999.blogspot.com/
Published a book called "The Rainbow And The Treasure". It is a compilation of extracts from various sources to introduce Buddhism to beginners. (Currently out of print)
Education/Credentials
Bachelor of Commerce And Administration, Victoria University Of Wellington, NZ.(1974)
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