Expert: Joe McSorley - 9/11/2009

Question
I have been reading books, watching videos, and searching the internet over and over because everything says the same thing and I try to meditate,being conscious of the breath,but I have a problem with knowing if im doing it right.I know Im not supposed to wonder because I would not be mindful,but how do you be mindful correctly. I have read some of your answers and they are hard to understand, so maybe you can answer this like im a dummy.when I meditate,or what i believe might be meditating,I breathe normally and follow it by feeling the air fill my stomach,and when thoughts come i notice it and return to my breathing.Do i think subconsciously,about anything,or focus on something while feeling my breath? My other question is, for example, mindful while working. How do I stock produce, or lets say apples,mindfully.Do I think at all,in order to focus on just the apple?Or do I not think, and just subconsciously know what im doing? Another way to put the question,how do I do something mindfully?I mean what do i think,what do i sense,what is it? Is it like being a ghost? and watching me,the apple,the place i put the apple, like being seperate from my body? I am very interested in mindfulness and have been at it for quite some time but not getting anywhere, i only end up being quiet and NOT myself from all the focusing all day on one thing at a time, until i just have to quit for a day or read more on it.(I am also rushed by my manager and I have anxiety,but take medication for it)So my mind is always on what to do next,you know,rushed and confused.I need mindfulness.But i need to understand how it is cultivated,exactly.

Answer
Hello Johnny,
You are not a dummy.  This can be a very confusing topic and I fully understand your frustration.  One of my teachers used to shout at me “just do it” when I asked how.  He meant just keep your mind clear and do what you are doing, fully engaged in what you are doing and not letting the mind wander from the task.  If you are stocking apples, just do that, don’t let your mind wander thinking about the girl in the next aisle or the football game or anything else, just stock apples.  This does not mean to be removed from it but to be fully engaged in it.  This is where people often talk about the mindfulness of mountain climbers.  They have to pay extreme attention to what they are doing at every moment or they will fall.  This forces them to be mindful; it is not a luxury but a necessity.  Anyone who does any intense sport has to be completely aware of what they are doing so that they don’t hurt themselves.  When you stock, just stock, just be there and do it with all your attention.  It should actually make you do it much faster than normal because it will be all you are concentrating on.
  Another way to look at being mindful is the idea of paying attention.  This does not mean to flit from thing to thing trying to grasp what is going on but just sit being aware of everything that is happening without letting your attention go to any particular point.  Take it all in at once.  Miyamoto Musashi describes it as being like a cat that watches the horizon; it just pays complete attention to everything while sitting still.  There is not an object to your attention or your mindfulness, just quietly be aware at all times. If you are walking, walk, talking, talking, talk and working, just work.  In this state you will respond appropriately to things as yourself so you need not worry about not being you.  If someone were to suddenly throw you a ball wouldn’t you react to it purely and spontaneously without a thought?  I think you most likely would catch it without a second thought.  How can this happen when your mind does not become involved in it?
It is because you reacted from your core and not your thoughts.  You know what to do and when to do it and by paying attention you free yourself to act spontaneously and purely.  Also, in this state you will breathe naturally without a thought about it.  When you sleep your breath is deep and natural and it is not guided by thought and so shall it become in your conscious state when you settle into it mindfulness or paying attention.  You don’t have to worry about it; it will come on its own.
   Most of all do not practice with expectation.  By this I mean don’t practice anticipating a result because this will hinder your practice.  Just do it and live your life.  Results will come suddenly and unexpectedly when you do it this way.  You need not worry about doing something wrong.  You are already part of nature and your true nature will arise on its own time.  It’s like cultivating a garden; you do the work and let nature do its course.  You set the conditions and nature will do the rest so you need not try to force anything.
    Just do your job and stop worrying about it.  You will lose yourself to your work and do a better job of it this way, paying pure attention to what matters.  If your mind wanders from what you are doing, no problem, just go back to the task at hand.  Eventually you will master this and not give it a thought.
I hope this is clearer for you.  Let me know if it is not.
       Take care,
                 Joe