Expert: Justin Choo - 10/17/2010

Question
My father past away long time ago, leave us with some property, my mother want to sell the property, after she sold the property, she want 75 % of the money, and 25 % divide 4 for us ( the children), we didn't agree, so she is really angry and said she doesn't feel she has children anymore, she disowned us and she said all her children are bad persons.
She always call us , yelling and said many bad word, can you help us what we have to do, I would like to lost contact with her.
This is not the first time she did that.

Answer
Hi Karine,

Actually, this site is about questions on Buddhism, and not about counselling on family affairs.  However, since you asked, I shall try to share my personal opinion.

The kind of comments I make will take into acount your racial background.  It is my view that Western and Asian family values differ.  From your narration, I am assuming that you are from an Asian culture.  I shall make some comments along this Asian background.  

The most important aspect of Asian family culture is respect for one's parents.  On this count alone, I think you may have a weak case.  Another consideration is that the property belonged to your father, and that means effectively your mother is entitled to fully inherit that property.

Disowning one's children is a very unwise decision.  If nothing else, age is at catching up with her.  I am sure she would be better off if there are loving children beside her in her twilight years.  She obviously did not think of this in her moment of anger and frustration.

I don't know the other factors, so I am just basing on the facts you gave me.  Nevertheless, as I said this is a Buddhist site; so I have no business to provide counsel.  If you disagree with me, most probably you would, please just disregard what I have commented. It is just my humble personal opinion, as a conservative Asian elder.

Take care.

Justin Choo