Expert: Justin Choo - 11/2/2006

Question
I have gone to the temple with him and met the monks he's learning from but am too embarrassed to ask the monks what they do with the offerings. My son feels the offering is for Buddha and Buddha will find a way to remove it and until then it gets to stay. He has 2 youth aged books the head monk gave him to read and he explains to me every night before bed what he has read, and so far nothing about alters.
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The text above is a follow-up to ...

-----Question-----
My son is a beginner buddhist (12 years old) and I'm trying to support his new beleifs but I know almost nothing of buddhism. He has an alter in his room and we don't know when or how to remove his offerings of candy and fruit, or what to do with them when we remove them.
-----Answer-----
Hi Aubriella,

First, let me express my respect for your liberal consideration of your son's newfound belief.  It is not common to have such understanding and supportive parents when it comes to practising an "alien" religion.  

As with all religions, there is always the risk of wrong understanding and wrong practice.  I hope your son is embarking on the right approach.  Perhaps you may ask him to share what he knows about Buddhism, and from there to gauge whether he is following the real teachings of the Buddha.

As for your query, it is best that you ask him directly.  I am sure he will be too happy to share his knowledge with you.

Buddhism is actually a very simple and practical "religion".  The rites and rituals were not introduced by the Buddha.  He was more concerned with the teachings of universal truths; truths about our existence and the true nature of this world; how to live a happy, harmless and contented life.  It was his followers in later years who introduced the different rites and rituals to suit their traditional practices.  As such all the offerings are just human gestures symbolizing faith and respect for the Buddha.  Of course through the passage of time people, for whatever reasons, misinterpreted these rites and rituals as Buddhism.

As a concerned parent, you may want to read a bit about Buddhism.  For a very short elementary introduction click here:
http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/buddhism/pbs2_unit04.htm

For a better understanding, click here:
http://www.buddhanet.net/pdf_file/whatbelieve.pdf

Please come back if you need further information.

Smile from justinchoo :-)  

Answer
Hi Aubriella,

Since you know the temple, I may be able to shed some light if you would divulge the name of the temple, its location, and possibly the tradition that is practised.  The name of the monk will also be able to give some clues to its authenticity.  

By referring to your statement which I quote: " My son feels the offering is for Buddha and Buddha will find a way to remove it and until then it gets to stay."
This is a very disturbing piece of news.  Based on this statement alone I can safely say that your son is being misled.  The Buddha is dead and gone.  It is his teachings that we follow to gain results, and NOT praying to the Buddha and waiting for him to send us to heaven or to partake our offerings to him.

Please be careful and not let bogus monks hookwink your son.  If need be, you may suggest to your son to study the proper teachings of the Buddha and also to find alternative temples which are genuine.  If you need further info, please come back.

Take care.

Justinchoo.