Expert: Bodhicitta - 7/26/2005

Question
DEAR BODHICITTA
last night my brotherinlaw died a horrible death';';;'he had a lung aneurysm and bled to death smothering in his own blood while my sister watched and tried couragiously  to help him  ';;'he went into a coma thank god';;'but my question BODHICITTA
was Teddy aware of the smothering ? by the sound of the reports he certainly was ;;';how does one console them selves with knowing that people are dying in fear and terror
how do i explain to my sister that Teddy was okay';;';' that he was not there when she has the memory of his eyes playing over and over in her head;;how do i stop the thoughts that this could happen to anyone of us and yet people walk around oblivious to the fact that death is usually pretty terrifying for the person dying and the people present;';'what can one say to someone who suffers from extreme panic attackes and the terror reigns supreme
can you help me or suggest a link i can go to ';;'i have a library of books on nde's and reincarnation, soul,. spirit., after death  ohh the list goes on but not one of these books touch on the fact that so many peaple are so scared of death and that very fear is stopping them from living freely;';i know,,, for i suffer from agoraphobia brought on from my irrational fear of death;';';'not after death but the actual death experience
i pray you may be able to answer these questions and lead me to  an idea or a suggestion that may be able to help me and my darling sister come to terms with this horrid death of a loved one who was the bright light that shone in our lives';';;he is gone';'; but to  where and how bad did he suffer and why did he have to suffer so? IS THERE LIFE AFTER DEATH? hOW caN one attain peace from this hidious fear
kind regards helen(star)


Answer
Helen
I am sorry you have experienced a great loss.

Buddhism teachs that there is continuity after death. Death is not the end. We should have complete confidence in this fact. If you want to really understand why Buddhists have confidence in this you would have to find a Buddhist teacher
near you that you can meet and practice meditation! But
for now take my word for it.

You ask many questions.I feel your questions are good.
You should search for the truth of life and death! what is
there else to do. We are all going to die. Try and find
a copy of the life story of the Buddha and read it
and then write to me again

Blessings
Bodhicitta