Expert: Denise Anne Taylor - 2/4/2011

Question
Hello,

I have a co-worker who once said to me "you make me look bad."
Why should I adjust my performance so he looks good? Don't you think this is selfish on his part?

Thank you for taking the time to assist me.

Answer
Jean,

Your co-worker statement is quite general.  To avoid future conflict in the place of work schedule a time to talk privately together.  

You want to get specific instances where only your perceived actions affected this co-worker directly.  

Stay with FACTS.  Then begin to understand the IMPACT that this co-worker believes these actions had directly on them.  Show RESPECT for what they believe are true concerns regarding "you make me look bad", and then determine a REQUEST for action that will be agreeable to both of you.

This is a part of business communications, and it is important to address in a professional manner for greater understanding, especially, if you work in the same department or team.

Avoid name calling such as "selfish" or disregarding their comments.  Once you have the FACTS, then you can determine how to find a solution without compromising your work ethic.  If this fails to accomplish some form of understanding then it may have to be dealt with at a higher level.

Good luck!

Denise Anne Taylor