Business Etiquette/hosting a benefit fundraiser

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Expert: - 2/8/2011


Question
My husband died 2 months ago, leaving me with a $6300 funeral bill and no life insurance.  Would it be in good taste for me to host a benefit to help pay this balance?  I am unemployed and cannot afford to pat it.

Answer
Dear Kathy:
While it is never really in good taste to ask for money from others, there is an exception to the rule. I suggest that you have a friend host this benefit on behalf of your husband and another charity. If you ask for help from people you know, you give them a choice to say yes or no.  What I would do is to ask your friend to give a party where the vendors donate their services and products. This will minimize your friend's expenses.  I would explain that this is a benefit to remember your husband.  Explain too that some of the proceeds will pay for final expenses for him and the rest will be for the benefit of a charity of your choice (perhaps one that your husband was involved with?).  What would be really tacky is to keep any money that wasn't needed to pay for his final expenses for yourself.  It goes along the same rule as giving yourself a birthday party or bridal shower.  Good etiquette doesn't allow that.  Have someone else give it in your husband's honor.

I hope this helps.

Best regards,
Cynthia Lett

Business Etiquette

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Cynthia W. Lett

Expertise

Author of "That's So Annoying - An Etiquette Expert On The World's Most Irritating Habits And What To Do About Them" . One of the few Certified Etiquette Professionals (CEP) and Certified Protocol Professionals(CPP) earned by examination through the International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals (www.ispep.org). I will be happy to answer your questions about business or social etiquette, international customs or protocol issues.

Experience

Ms. Lett has trained over 100 etiquette professionals worldwide to teach the subject to professionals and children. She has worked in 102 countries and is expert in doing business in unfamiliar cultures. Ms. Lett is principal of The Lett Group since 1983. Professionally, Ms. Lett is the founder of and serves as Executive Director of the International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals headquartered in Washington, DC.

Organizations
University Club of Washington, DC She is an active member of the National Speakers Association, American Society for Training and Development; Women Business Owners; Professional Convention Management Association; and past member of the American Society of Association Executives; Foundation for International Meetings (Board of Governors 1986-1987). She was elected into Who's Who of American Women; Who's Who of Advertising Executives; 2000 Notable American Women; Who's Who of the World's Women; Who's Who of U.S. Executives and Who's Who of the World.

Publications
Ms.Lett is the author of "That's So Annoying: An Etiquette Expert On The World's Most Irritating Habits And What To Do About Them" available wherever books are sold and at www.thatssoannoyingbook.com. She has been featured and quoted in publications such as Successful Meetings, Meetings and Conventions, Meeting News, Business Travel News, Washington Business Journal, Washington Post, New York Times, Regardies Magazine, Wall Street Journal, The Robb Report, Entrepreneur Magazine, The Harvard Business Review, Ohio Business Review, Training and Development Journal, CIO Magazine and others

Education/Credentials
Certified Protocol Professional Certified Etiquette Professional Certificate: Adult Learning Techniques - George Washington University Master-Legal Studies - Antioch School of Law BS - Restaurant, Hotel & Institutional Management - Purdue University BA - Public Relations / Interpersonal Communications - Purdue University

Awards and Honors
Distinguished Darden Professor - Purdue University

Past/Present Clients
During 1990, Ms. Lett planned a series of Business Exchange meetings in the Soviet Union for entrepreneurs from the United States who wished to learn about joint ventures with the Soviets in many different fields. She is featured in the PBS special – Pioneer Living – as the protocol expert. Ms. Lett is also the etiquette expert for the Fine Living Channel and currently featured in Survival Guide – Office Etiquette. She is also a frequent expert on etiquette issues for Fox Cable News.

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