Expert: Denise Anne Taylor - 2/7/2012

Question
Dear Denise,

I'm writing to you from UK desperately seeking advice.

I have been asked by my significant other if I would accompany him to an evening business dinner with a Russian associate who's spouse will also be present. I have accepted but now I'm slightly panicked.

My partner is a business development manager in the oil and gas industry (something I know little about but quite willing to research). My background is in recruitment and whilst I have been to business lunches before for my own work I have never been to a business dinner in the evening and nor I have I been to a meal where spouses have been in attendance.

I have no idea what the correct protocol is! What is my role for the night? Appropriate attire? Conversation topics?

Naturally I will seek guidance from my partner but I would like to get some back up advice so I handle the situation with poise and help make it a successful event for him.

Many Thanks.

Answer
Pam,

Your role is to establish rapport and bonding to solidfy the business relationship that your husband has secured.

Conversation topics include...travel, food, latest books or movies you have experienced, and most importantly ask questions of those in your presence.  I teach that even the most shy of individuals will find freedom in conversation if they just ask a few questions..."Tell me more, I had no idea about ______(whatever interest they have-insert here)", the basic How, When, Where, What type of questions when someone mentions a topic of interest can keep conversation flowing.

Most dinners or invitations to a dinner event will state the attire required.  If attire is not noted, then conservative basics and preferrably a skirt or dress for women.  Err on the side of formality as being too casual may not play well in the social business setting.  

Listening attentively will go far, and avoid too much alcohol.  Smile.  Use a firm handshake and I believe you will find that the evening will be easier than you anticipate.

Good luck.

Denise Anne Taylor