Expert: Kaylyn Anderson - 4/16/2009

Question
QUESTION: Hi Kaylyn,

I'm not very clear about American Style of writing. I'll be much obliged if you would be kind to take a look at my article on IVR for a particular local enterprise, and provide me with the tips to improve my writing skill in American Style. Here's my writeup for your peruse:

Deluxe IVR provides interactive voice response (IVR) systems which route caller to interact quickly and accurately with the information stored in a computer through touchtone and voice recognition.  Our desire to provide you with the quick easily navigable menu has brought us to this moment of solving your various IVR problems.

No matter the size and line of work, one way or the other IVR systems has paid off enormously in terms of time, money and work. Thereby not only saving enterprises expenses but also eliminating unwanted hassles without the threat of losing clients. The availability of access to the service round the clock irrespective of where you are makes your life all the more easier and faster.

Though operations differ with various IVR Providing Company, Deluxe IVR offers a wide range of features which allows you to choose according to your business needs. We enjoy growing with your business by accelerating your customer caller connection.


Thanking you in anticipation for your feedback.

Yours Appreciatively
Ricky



ANSWER: Dear Ricky,
Thank you for writing to AllExperts.com. I enjoyed your marketing piece.

It's very good, actually. I notice a couple (MINOR) errors.

Deluxe IVR provides interactive voice response (IVR) systems which route caller to interact quickly and accurately with the information stored in a computer through touchtone and voice recognition.  

         Note: If you use "which," you must insert a comma
         before using it. Change to "that." "route
         a caller"


No matter the size and line of work, one way or the other IVR systems has paid off enormously in terms of time, money and work.

         Note: "one way or the other" doesn't make sense.
         Do you mean "one or the other?" I'm not sure what
         it means, but it might to you and the customer of the
         system.  

         Note: insert a comma after "money."

Thereby not only saving enterprises expenses but also eliminating unwanted hassles without the threat of losing clients.
        
         Note: Change this sentence. Therefore, IVR not only
         saves enterprising expenses, but also eliminates...


Though operations differ with various IVR Providing Company, Deluxe IVR offers a wide range of features to choose according to your business needs. (I revised the second part of this sentence.)

         Note: Although...
         Note: What do you mean by "various IVR Providing Company"?
         You may want to revise this a bit.
        

We enjoy growing with your business by accelerating your customer caller connection.
       
         Note: accelerating is an unusual use, but it seems
         to work here.

Take care; I wish you all the best.

Sincerely,
Kaylyn



---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hi Kaylyn,

Thank you for your prompt reply. It indeed helped me a lot.

English is not my first language. I was taught in Indian and British English, due to that my exposure to the American English is limited I felt. Would you be kind to explain about the difference between American English and British English from the article writing stand point? And how I should go about to groom my writing skill?

Thank you so much.

Appreciatively
Ricky


Answer
Dear Ricky,

One cannot answer the question in this limited space. If you want some reference guides to perfect American writing, I sell four guides: Parts of Speech, Punctuation, Sentences, and Paragraphs. These would be excellent for you, give you practice and provide continual reference in your endeavors.

Sincerely,
Kaylyn