Expert: Dan Smith - 7/27/2004

Question
Hello,
can you help me edit my cause and effect essay please.  Thank You.

     Some people choose to go to university because its faster in life, but the reason i  attend college for more confidence, more jobs available and more education.
     First is self-respect.  For a long time now, I have felt little self-respect.   I spent a lot of time doing nothing, just hanging around or getting into trouble, and eventually I began to feel bad about it.  Going to college is a way to start feeling better about myself.  By accomplish things.  For example, like obtaining my high school diploma, and fulfill my personal goals, I will improving my self-image.
       Second, reason for going to college is that things happened in my life that made me think about a change.   For one thing, I lost the part-time job I had.  When I lost the job, I realized I would have to do something so that I can get a good job in the future and fulfill my dreams.  However, when opportunity comes to attend college, then I have to make some kind of effort.
        The third and most serious reason for college is to get a degree to my CAA license, and I want to take the necessary steps to reach the standard.  Only by gaining my CAA certificate can I get anything what I want.  
        These are the main reasons why I am attending college.  I have seen time and time again the beneficial results of going to college.  My high school gave me a firm foundation in education, but only through going to college will help me on my way to my future dreams. All students should have the opportunity to go to a college.  I was given the chance, and everyday I reap the rewards of going to college.  

Answer
My first comment is that this is probably not what your teacher meant by a cause-and-effect essay. This is an explanation of why you are taking an action. It is true that you expect some outcomes from that action, but usually this assignment means that you are supposed to show how some event has led to a consequence. That said, I'll go ahead and edit it. My comments and explanations are in parentheses where I thought some comment was necessary. You'll have to remove them, of course.

   Some people choose to go to university because it's (this is the contraction of "it is", the only time "its" takes an apostrophe) faster (what can "faster" possibly mean in this context? I can't edit something that has no meaning)) in life. But the reason I want a college education is to gain access to more jobs and better jobs and increase my confidence and self respect.
   For a long time now, I have felt little self-respect. I spent a lot of time doing nothing, just hanging around or getting into trouble, and eventually I began to feel bad about it. Going to college is a way to start feeling better about myself. By accomplishing such goals as obtaining my high school diploma I will improve my self-image.
   My second reason for going to college is that things happened in my life that made me think about a change. For one thing, I lost a part-time job. When I lost the job, I realized I would have to do something so that I can get a good job in the future and fulfill my dreams. The opportunity to attend college provided the "something to do," but it also required that I make some kind of effort.
      The third, and most serious, reason for attending college is to get the degree required to get my CAA (you need to write this out rather than use the acronym; the reader may not know what a CAA is - I don't) license, and I want to take the necessary steps to reach the standard. Only by gaining my CAA certificate can I get anything what I want.
      These are the main reasons why I am attending college. I have seen time and time again the beneficial results of going to college. My high school gave me a firm foundation in education, but only through going to college will I be able to reach my future dreams. All students should have the opportunity to go to a college. I was given the chance, and everyday I reap the rewards of going to college.

There you go. Just take out my comments in the parentheses, and it'll be OK. But it is still not really what you were assigned. You need to do something about "faster." I have no idea what you were trying to say there and can't help with no idea at all.