Expert: Lee Charles Kelley - 1/26/2008

Question
QUESTION: my 4 year old son was just diagnosed with allergies to our dog. the dog "bandit" is 11 years old border collie and sheltie mixed and is very attached to me.  we are going to have to give him away and my mother has agreed to take him.  how do we make the transition smooth and less stressful on bandit. i am concerned because he is older and the last time we left him with her he did not do well.  do we do it gradually or not?  should i stop and vist or not?  i want him to be ok. it is like giving up my child. please help.  

Tawnya Holbrook
Huttonsville, WV

ANSWER: Hi, Tawnya,

Thanks for the question. I'm sorry to hear about Bandit's situation.

I'm curious about what you mean that "he did not do well" the last time you left him with your mother. If I had more information about what that means exactly I think I could be more helpful. Also, when you left him with her before, how much of his usual "stuff" (bed, toys, etc.) did you take over there with him?

LCK

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: When we left him with her he hid under the bed and would not eat. We took his faviorite toys and treats. He does not have a bed. He sleeps in our bedroom under our bed.  My mom is very good with animals that is why we were so suprised.

Thanks,
Tawnya

Answer
Thanks for the further info. (Sorry it took so long to get back to you, but I've had server problems...)

I guess it's going to be hard for Bandit to adjust to his new life. The best thing you can do for him is give him lots and lots of playtime at "grandma's" house. Play has tons of benefits for a dog's spirit and emotions. (See this article: http://www.tiny.cc/playbenefits )

And yes, I think you should come to visit him as often as possible. He'll really enjoy that, and probably look forward to it. When you visit, play tug and fetch with him. (You should always let a dog win at tug.) If he's reluctant to play tug, play "chase me," where you tease him with a toy or a treat, then run away. The more he chases you, the more he'll have an urge to bite, which you can eventually turn into a game of tug.

I'd also recommend that your mother hand feed Bandit all his meals, using the pushing exercise described here: http://tinyurl.com/3balu6 It'll help Bandit because it sounds like his usual strategy, in a new situation, is to find a hidey-hole, where he know he'll be safe. The pushing exercise will give him more confidence that he can get what he really wants out of life--that he doesn't have to hide under the bed.

Also, I'd recommend getting him a crate, a little den of his own. Don't worry about the door, in fact I'd take the door off. Just make sure there's a comfy bed inside, and lots of bones and toys. Hopefully, over time, he'll come to prefer sleeping in his "den" to hiding under the bed. It'll feel the same on one level, but it'll be a healthier alternative.

I hope this helps! I'll be thinking good thoughts for Bandit's transition!

LCK