Expert: Alan J Turner, SATS LL1 - 12/3/2007

Question
Hi Alan, my dog's name is Ruby and I have had her for about 8 years.  I am not sure of her age, we got her at a shelter that didn't have her history but estimate her to be 2 yrs old at the time.  She is a mix, part golden lab but not sure what else, she looks just like a golden lab but only about 50 lbs.
The issue I am having with her is she seems to be afraid of me, like she is in trouble.  What doesn't make sense is that she is not afraid of anyone else.  When I come home she will run into the back bedroom and hide, she will stay there all night.  When she sees me she will wag her tail and act excited but turn and retreat.  If I approach her, she is not agressive, but she cowers and sometimes urinates if I try to pet her.  I have had this dog for 8 years, and she was always "my" dog, she would listen to me or come to me over anyone else.  She has been having seizures over the past couple years on and off, but not frequently and the vet didn't seem too concerned about that.  She actually started acting this way when I remodeled the living room a few months ago, where she used to lay all the time, when I put in new carpet and took away the table she always laid under, she started laying around the back bedroom, and that's about the time she started avoiding me.  Maybe that has something to do with it?  I still can't understand why she is just like this with me.  My wife, daughter, friends, etc she acts somewhat normal around.  I can't think of anything I might have done, or what I can do to make things the way they used to be?  I miss my dog.  Sorry this is long winded, but if you have any ideas or advice, I would really appreciate it.  Thanks...

Answer
Dear Jeff,
Thanks for writing. Perhaps the noise you made while remodeling frightened her? No telling why she has this change- and there's no need to focus on any previous events because we can't go back in time and change them.

If this represents a sudden change in her behavior, I would get her checked by your vet. Whatever is causing the seizures or another medical issue may have spawned this change. If she has always been a bit shy around you, then this is just a magnification of an ongoing problem.

Have you recently changed her food? If not, try a quality senior food (18% protein for dry foods) that doesn't contain any by-products, corn products, or flour. Diet can sometimes play a role in fearful behaviors.

You stated "My wife, daughter, friends, etc she acts somewhat normal around". If "somewhat normal" includes shy behaviors, then again, her behavior with you is a magnified version of her behavior around others. That means it's not necessarily the result of your interactions, but is a symptom of a general problem.

Start feeding her by hand- only you. Don't bend down to pet her - get low on the floor and let her come to you. Don't coax her- let her come at her own pace.  

When you first arrive home, toss a few pieces of treats on the floor and keep walking - right past her - without a word or a glance.

Reevaluate how you interact. DO she know any obedience commands / tricks? If not, start a training program based on rewards. A clicker works good for this. Teach her to fetch. Take her for walks. Make a point to hold interactions with her that are fun for her and not stressful.

I hope you get your dog back soon. Thanks for writing.