AboutJeroen R. van Olst Expertise “What do I want to do?” This, along with: “How am I going to do this?” and “Am I on the right track?” is the most frequently asked question I have received in my career as a vocational counselor to students and career advisor and coach to all-level professionals.
Experience With a vast professional and human experience in the international business community, now, for the past 15 years, I work as an independent counselor to those who want to find their talents and live a full and happy professional and personal life.
Education/Credentials BA Hotel Administration, BA Advertising. For the rest, I received my professional and personal education by working hard and with a lot of blood, sweat and tears.
I am lost and I dont know what to do. I wish you could shed some light for me.
I'm 28 years old and a degree holder in business studies. Currently working in the customer service dept for almost 3 years. Although the company that currently i'm working for is good, i dont like my role in customer service. i want a change. i know that if i continue working in my dept, the chances of getting a promotion and salary increase are there.
however, i feel that i dont learn much in my current position. apart from improving my communication skills, writing skills..there's nothing much. i'm afraid if i decide to resign later, i dont know what job that i can choose apart from customer service. and, of course, i might not get high salary if i decide to venture into another field other than customer service. i want to have a skill, just like those people in Human Resource, computer programming, accounting because i know they will surely get a job easily with higher pay if they decide to look for a new job. but, customer service? i dont think so...
anyway, fast forward...i always like to do event management, i.e. managing and coordinating the logistics of an event, get to travel to different countries for the events. although i've never worked in this industry, i really want to give it a try. God must be very kind to me and answered my prayers..cos today an event management company wanted to hire me as event coordinator for their conferences, seminars and workshops. I'm going to work with the event manager and manage & coordinate the conferences and workshop. It'll be almost 80% administrative work and I get to travel to different countries to coordinate the events. Plus, I'm also getting an increment of 30% from my current salary.
I am very happy that the company wanted to hire me. I mean, I should be happy, right?
But right now, I'm confused, worried and scared. I'm desparately looking for job now because i want a change. I want a change in career before its too late. but why am i so worried at the same time? is it bcos i've been working in this dept for 3 years, i know almost everything, i'm a senior executive/team leader in my dept. I'm familiar with the company, the people. I'm almost in my comfort zone. I'm afraid to change. what if i cant handle the new job? what if my new boss puts high expectation on me but i cant perform? what if i cant maintain in my new job for long? a lot of my colleagues have resigned because they know they wont have much future advancement in my dept. but..as much as i want to resign and do something that i like..did i make a wise decision? i have not tendered my resignation letter yet, bcos i'm uncertain. i keep telling myself not to simply accept a new job just bcos i want to get out of my company. i have a feeling that this new job is going to be good. but...
i just dont know wats wrong with me. my close friend said this is a good opportunity. with higher salary and a new challenge..something that i have the ability to do..they trust that i can do it..but why i have this weird feeling? this 'scared, afraid' feeling..
pls help!
Answer Dear Jess,
Reading your question, I am tempted to say, and understand me well on this, in the best possible way: What are you waiting for? The feelings and thoughts you have about getting this opportunity are spot-on. While all the arguments and questions you put to yourself about going for the new job are already answered in what you write. It’s a freebie dealt to you. Surprised? I know I would be! What a wonderful experience! Confusing? Oh yes, indeed! Still, our mind wants to think it over and get us to sit down and stay where we are. It’s so comfortable, so easy. You know your current job, it’s routine. And routine becomes boring, at one point Because we know what we’ve got, but not exactly what we’re going to get. Still, isn’t that true for everything we do? It is only after the fact that we can say, ‘This was good!’ Or, while we’re doing it, ‘This is good!’ Saying, ‘This will be good!’ is only wishful thinking, not a reality, because we haven’t actually experienced that something good yet. Very important, wishful thinking, but it holds expectations, rather than hope. And expectations, high or low, tend to become a disappointment, because we make up a whole story in our mind, a fantasy. Hope gives life, expectations hinder full development.
Afraid of change? Me too! But it’s inherent to the human condition. Don’t hide fear, work with it. It is not your enemy. It is a part of you that will always be there, so make it work for you, instead of it working with you.
Your heart tells you to take this new job. Listen to yourself (your heart). Your mind is only playing tricks on you, for the sake of comfort. The mind loves routine, because then it doesn’t have to thin anymore and solve cumbersome problems. The mind wants to play, while, in fact, you are already done playing and want to move on. The mind is the child, the heart is the mature adult. The mature adult, heart, is in charge, not the child, fear.
Will your new boss put high expectations on your performance? Ask him/her what they are. Ask all the questions you feel you need to ask, and don’t hesitate. After all, this is about you, and not your new boss. He/she is actually privileged that you are willing to work with him/her. They won’t see it that way, but that’s just an act on their part. Isn’t it true that without you, or someone else, they can’t exist as a company?
You may want to ask yourself what your true motives are to stay in this job. What’s the pay-off? What do you get out this confusing feeling of fear and uncertainty? Be honest with yourself, uncontaminated by the tricks of the mind. Tough, indeed! Still, it will help you come to a clear conclusion and decision. Listen yourself, read what you wrote me again, and go for what you truly want: This job you really want!
You may also want to read some of the answers I wrote to similar questioners on AllExperts, also in the 'Finding Your Purpose in Life' category.
My advice?
“Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
Mark Twain
