Expert: Taylor Sheppard - 10/21/2007

Question
Hello, I am a freshman in college and in a few weeks I will be performing in my first college show. I should probably mention that I am very serious about the art of acting and love it more than anything. I have performed in numerous high school shows and have won a few awards and a scholarship.

This is my problem: I am very excited to perform in this show, and I have all of my lines memorized already (the other 2 actors in the show don't yet) except whenever I think about the week of our performance, I just get a terrible vision of me blanking out or someone else blanking out. I have never blanked out in a performance before, but I can just not get over this fear somehow. (It happened once at a dress rehearsal years ago and it was terrible!)It is causing me to almost dread the performances, which is terrible! I want to enjoy it, but I can't if I'm afraid of forgetting! (I have never had this many lines or monologues before which may also be contributing to this anxiousness.)

I know that as a professional actress I will have to deal with memorizing obviously, but how do I get over my fear of forgetting during a performance? I want to be able to go out there and really listen to the other characters words and not be thinking about my upcoming lines so that I will truly be speaking as this character...(and I know about giving each line emotional significance, which I have done). Mainly, when it comes down to it, I'm afraid of not doing my best.

Any suggestions for dealing with these feelings would be VERY appreciated!

Answer
Hi Mariam,

Ahhh, an ages old actor's dilemma!
You are definitely not alone, all of us have been there!

Strangely, your blocking can aid your cues for lines if learned together. Even though you have your lines memorized, the one thing you can do is continue working your lines and moreover, learning the PART, rather than the lines. WHY you had the reaction to what was said by the other actor, and then tie it to the action. For film, this can be bad, because often, the director will get a vision of how to change the action of the scene to better it, and you will lose your bearings. I know its easier said than done, but it is best to have thought out what to do if you "go up" on your lines on stage. That will give you a certain level of comfort. What I mean is, knowing that if you lose your train of thought, that you will recover and NOT dwell on the flub. If you dwell on it, just as thinking about "Oh My God, What IF!" before you have flubbed, you will likely flub again. Ice skaters know this in figure skating. Mentally prepare for the possibility and it will minimize the actual event, if it should even happen!

Having had this happen makes you a bit pre-traumatized, but it doesn't necessarily predict the future. The main thing is to work on concentration -being in the character. When you are being the character it is hard not to do well. Is that easy? depends. I am a bit ADD, so it has been a struggle, but I develop rituals to put myself where I need to be to get there. THAT will be your journey -finding what it takes to lose yourself in the woman you are playing.
I tend to remain in character even off-set because I get so deep into it. I warn my friends that I may seem odd because I am working on something, and they know and accept it.

I would also ponder WHY the inner voice is trying to foil you. You must say to yourself that you DESERVE to be an actor and you ARE good enough!

Best, Taylor