Expert: Cynthia Bedell - 6/24/2008

Question
I have been in a serious relationship for two years. I'm not sure if we will stay together "forever" or what is going to happen. I'm enlisting into the Marines and I'm worried about how the living conditions work. I don't want to marry this young but I want to be able to see my boyfriend and I want to be able to live with him. So basically how does this work? DO I get to live where i would like if i can afford it? Can i live with my boyfriend? If not how often will i be able to see him? Any information about this issue would be very helpful because it makes me extremely nervous. Thank you so much for your time!

Answer
Dear Chantal  --

During your Marine training you cannot live anywhere except the barracks.  Even if you were married, you would still live in the training barracks with the other trainees.

After you complete your training, then your options will vary depending on your rank and where you are stationed.  Unmarried Marines with higher ranks (non-commissioned officers (NCO), warrant officers and commissioned officers) usually can live off base in housing that they can afford.  Unmarried junior enlisted members are required to live in the barracks.  

Your boyfriend cannot live with you in the barracks.  However, depending on your mission, and your command, you can maintain a room in the barracks and visit your boyfriend when you are not on duty.  He would have to relocate to a town or city near your new duty station at his own expense.  The Marine Corps will only pay to move you and your official family members (spouse and children).   

If you join a unit that will be deployed a lot, I do not recommend having your boyfriend move to your new location.  It is better to have him be where he has friends, a job and a place to live.  Once you have completed your deployment and will be in one place for a long time, then is a better time for him to move.  Spouses and significant others that move for their military member and then are left alone, often resent the upheaval in their lives and blame the military service member for their woes.  Divorce and break-up often occur.  But couples that leave the non-military member where they have a support network do much better.  You can visit him using your leave time; you get 30 days of leave a year.

Good luck to you.  Please write back if you have additional questions.